Terrible Book Club

Terrible Book Club

terriblebookclub.com
We read (usually) terrible books so you don’t have to!


57 - The Mueller Report: Report on the Investigation into Russian Interference in the 2016 Presidential Election by Robert S. Mueller, III
May 14 • 101 min
This time, we figured we’d try to help you understand and - more importantly - laugh with us at The Mueller Report. It’s a 448 page U.S. government report with over 1,000 footnotes that few people were really going to read the entirety of, so we…
56 - In the House in the Dark of the Woods by Laird Hunt *Patron’s Choice*
Apr 30 • 96 min
Our Patron Signe chose this book as her once-per-year reward! Check out our Patreon here to get this and other rewards for yourself. In addition to our usual barnyard language, Content Warnings this week include: abuse/assault, captivity,…
55 - The Adventures of Lord Iffy Boatrace by Bruce Dickinson of Iron Maiden *Patron’s Choice*
Apr 16 • 65 min
Our Patron Greg chose this book as his once-per-year reward! Check out our Patreon here to get this and other rewards for yourself. In addition to our usual barnyard language, Content Warnings abound this week: abuse/assault, murder, racism,…
54 - 101 Weapons for Women: Implement Weaponry - A Unique Concept in Women’s Self Defense by Rodney R. Rice *Special Guest Paul Lowe*
Apr 2 • 80 min
This week we learn how to (not) defend ourselves with objects through a book infamous for its imagery! Thanks to our friend Chris H. for posting some images from this book on Facebook, which inspired Paris to do a reverse image search and…
53A - Operation Switcheroo! The Short Stories of Augie Peterson - Friend Request Movie Review
Apr 1 • 18 min
April Fool’s! Tomorrow you’ll get your regularly scheduled TBC episode, but for today we’re switching episodes with The Short Stories of Augie Peterson as a fun April Fool’s Day exercise to expose our respective listeners to something new….
53 - Mazeppa the Wolfhound: Part One: The Story of Mother Luhki and Nana by Raymond N. Dombkiewicz
Mar 19 • 99 min
Somehow we’re reading another Christian-leaning, dog related book with strange authorship. We really don’t know how this happened again. Thanks to longtime friend of the show Elisa for recommending this one! Content Warning: In addition to our…
52 - Super Mario Bros. 3: Brick by Brick by Bob Chipman *Patron’s Choice*
Mar 5 • 74 min
Our Patron Lynn chose this book as their once-per-year reward! Check out our Patreon here to get this and other rewards for yourself. No substantial Content Warnings this week - brief mentions of death and terrorist…
51 - The Crucible by Arthur Miller *Special Guests D & Ken from Antiques Freaks*
Feb 19 • 98 min
This week, we’re simultaneously in both the years 1953 and 1692. Luckily our friends D & Ken from the Antiques Freaks podcast have arrived to help us interpret The Crucible. Ken has more sticky notes than pages inside his copy of the…
50 - The Eclipse of Darkness: Unveiling the Unseen World by Robert Arden Szanyi
Feb 5 • 98 min
We received an anonymous recommendation to read this book. It is easily one of the most concentrated forms of delirium ever put to text. The Sunny Films website: https://sites.google.com/site/sunnyproductionfilms/ The interactive flash ‘game’…
49 - The Beginner’s Guide to Sex in the Afterlife: An Explanation of the Extraordinary Potential of Sexual Energy by David Staume
Jan 22 • 73 min
This time, we’re dead and trying to figure out just what to do with these incorporeal forms of ours. Luckily, a copy of David Straume’s Beginner’s Guide to Sex in the Afterlife was waiting here for us when we arrived in Purgatory. This…
48 - Into the Wild (Warriors #1/Warrior Cats #1) by Erin Hunter
Jan 8 • 75 min
Ah, cats - who doesn’t love a good cat video or cat meme? The world is full of cat-themed things, so it’s only natural that a cat fantasy series would eventually appear. If you really love cats, the collective corporate consciousness that is Erin…
47 - Growing Around: Party Panic by John ‘Enter’ Rozanski
Dec 25, 2018 • 80 min
A guy who reviews cartoons and is really invested in creating a cartoon series himself wrote a children’s chapter book in the universe that he’s been creating for a few years. There’s nothing wrong with this concept on the surface. Peer deeper into…
46 - Zarsthor’s Bane by Andre Norton
Dec 11, 2018 • 60 min
No real content warnings this week except for one off-hand misogynistic statement by a single character! There IS a weird scene that could be interpreted as being uh…dendrophilic, but unless you’re really freaked out by a little tree kissing there’s…
45 - A Specter is Haunting Texas by Fritz Leiber
Nov 27, 2018 • 62 min
Fritz Leiber may have coined the term “sword and sorcery” and he may have written some legendary stories, but this book is not to be counted among those same accomplishments. Content Warning! Drugs, generalized violence, racism, sex,…
44 - Small Town Cop/Big City Crimes {A Man, His Dogs and a Badge} by Darrell Day
Nov 13, 2018 • 86 min
Don’t be fooled! Darrel Day didn’t write this - or even edit it, apparently - he just put it on the internet for his friend, Terry Bandemer. Which is fine! It’s nice to help your friend put out their book - but why put your name on it as the author…
43 - Crabs: The Human Sacrifice: Book 6 in the Crab Series by Guy N. Smith
Oct 29, 2018 • 54 min
Happy Halloween! Enjoy this episode one day early as a treat from the Terrible Book Club. Crabs - The Human Sacrifice was suggested by reddit user dickdastardly and voted on by listeners as a spooky book for October. Content warning! This…
42 - Betrayed (House of Night Book #2) by Kristen Cast & P.C. Cast
Oct 16, 2018 • 91 min
Far away and 40 books ago, we read Marked, the first book in the House of Night Series by mother-daughter duo Kristen & P.C. Cast. It was the second book we read for the podcast and the first book we threw across a room (that’s not an…
41 - Luckiest Girl Alive by Jessica Knoll *Patron’s Choice*
Oct 2, 2018 • 101 min
Our Patron Veronica chose this book as her once-per-year reward! Check out our Patreon here to get this and other rewards for yourself. We’ve got a real intro now! Let us know what you think. Things get serious on TBC this week. This episode…
40 - The Angel Wore Fangs (Deadly Angels Series #7) by Sandra Hill
Sep 18, 2018 • 83 min
This book feels like the author created a massive dartboard where each section was a completely random idea or topic, put on a blindfold, threw darts, and chose what she would put in the book based on where those darts landed. If any of you are or…
39 - Antibodies: An X-Files Novel by Kevin J. Anderson
Sep 4, 2018 • 81 min
This time, we read an X-Files novel sanctioned by Chris Carter and it was just as pulpy as we expected. If you miss Mulder, Scully, and their crazy case files, you should check out this episode. Topics include nanotechnology, a very particular form of…
38 - Johnny Tremain by Esther Forbes *Special Guests D & Ken from Antiques Freaks*
Aug 21, 2018 • 75 min
Since this book takes place 200 years in the past, we figured we needed some experts on old stuff! D & Ken from Antiques Freaks join us this week to read Johnny Tremain. D helps us understand silversmithing while Ken defends his doctoral…
37 - Lawfully Challenged: Inspirational Christian Contemporary: A K-9 Lawkeeper Romance by Ginny Sterling
Aug 7, 2018 • 64 min
Cops that are dogs and dogs that are cops co-star in this sex-less Christian romance with an unreasonably long title! This story tries to cash in on the cross section of people who are Christian, fetishize men in uniform, and are really into dogs.
36 - Too Far by Rich Shapero
Jul 24, 2018 • 77 min
Ah, yes - remember being in love so fiercely that you disobeyed your parents, ran naked through the forest all evening, worshiped nature gods, and contacted the multiverse when you were SIX YEARS OLD? No? Yeah…probably not. Rich Shapero takes us on…
35 - Woman Worship by Dean Jean-Pierre
Jul 10, 2018 • 50 min
If you’re tired of plots and characters, this episode was made just for you! This time we read a book of poetry loosely held together by western gender norms, redundancy, and poor word choices. Paris reveals her theory about the hidden message behind…
34 - The Stain of Time V2: More Than A Trent Reznor Biography by Remanon Last
Jul 1, 2018 • 70 min
Have you ever really liked a band? Have you ever liked a band so much that you thought you found evidence in their lyrics that their frontman had lived previous lives and a demon helped you figure it out? Well hey, so did this author! This book IS…
33 - The Betrayal (Fear Street Saga #1) by R.L. Stine
Jun 21, 2018 • 47 min
Burning witches, evil dads and uncles, more foreshadowing than one could ever need, the most obviously evil necklace of all time, and - of course - unrequited love all rear their heads in this one! Paris has been binging the Goosebuds podcast and was…
32 - Crawfish, Baby!! by Duncan More
Jun 13, 2018 • 48 min
Can we interest you in some crawfish? Perhaps other types of seafood? Some jazz? How about some gay erotica? If you answered “yes” to any or all of these questions, you’ll love this 30 page short story that masquerades as a book! Thanks (?) to D from…
31 - Lands of the Earthquake by Henry Kuttner & Under A Dim Blue Sun by Howie K. Bentley
Jun 3, 2018 • 94 min
This time we read a short, double feature book with two fantasy/sci-fi novellas that were packaged together for seemingly no apparent reason: Lands of the Earthquake by Henry Kuttner Under A Dim Blue Sun by Howie K. Bentley Are they together because…
30 - Two Truths, A Lie, & Magic Rocks (…Also With Lies)
May 28, 2018 • 65 min
In this in-between books episode, it’s game time! Chris read a guide/miniature self-help book called Chakra Crystals by Kate Tomas about meditation and magical rocks and Paris tries to guess what each crystal is supposed to mean and what…
29 - Swamplandia! by Karen Russell *Special Guest Laura Filippi*
May 20, 2018 • 66 min
This time on Terrible Book Club, we read a book that wasn’t truly terrible! Wow! It happened! We also have special guest Laura Filippi on to educate us about Florida, alligator farms, and alligator wrestling! Paris & Chris talk about…
28 - Crossing Over: The Stories Behind the Stories by John Edward
Apr 21, 2018 • 99 min
Episode 28 is all about ghosts, mediums, and how Long Island seems to be some kind of breeding ground for psychics. If you’re a skeptic of supernatural phenomenon or have ever wondered about the John Edwards and Sylvia Browns of the world, this…
27 - Dragon Prince by Melanie Rawn *Patron’s Choice*
Apr 1, 2018 • 81 min
Our Patron Dari chose this book as her once-per-year reward! Check out our Patreon here to browse our reward structure and consider donating. Dragon Prince is a basic fantasy novel with medieval internet on light beams, dragon mating…
26 - You Suck! by Christopher Moore
Mar 5, 2018 • 76 min
You Suck! was given to Paris as a Secret Santa gift (thanks, Coty!) The book has some issues, but ultimately it’s a crass and somewhat amusing parody of the ever popular vampire romance novel. Listen to this one if you want to hear us talk about the…
25 - Audubon’s Watch by John Gregory Brown
Feb 12, 2018 • 59 min
Birds. Watches. Tits. These are things that old men from the 1800s love to talk about. Or, at least famous ornithologist John James Audubon liked to talk about, according to author John Gregory Brown? If you’re into historical “fiction” inspired by…
24 - Melanie’s Marvelous Measles by Stephanie Messenger
Dec 17, 2017 • 40 min
Episode 24 tackles the anti-vaccination phenomenon. Melanie’s Marvelous Measles was written by an anti-vaxxer author so parents could easily indoctrinate their children and get them severely ill, injured, or killed with warped ideas based on a…
23 - Ho Tactics: How to Mindf*ck a Man into Spending, Spoiling, & Sponsoring by G.L. Lambert
Dec 1, 2017 • 81 min
For November, we read a self-help book to help us become smart hos! G.L. Lambert has created the ultimate guide to being a sociopathic fraud winner! Read his book and get your rent paid by stalking wealthy men and lying constantly! **NSFW - do not listen…
22 - Stone of Tears by Terry Goodkind (Sword of Truth Series Book #2) *Special Guest TJ Allen*
Oct 27, 2017 • 117 min
Sexy nuns. Demon dicks. Naked horseback riding. All this and more can be found in Terry Goodkind’s Stone of Tears, the second entry in the Sword of Truth series. Chris and Paris return to the Midlands to catch up with Richard and Kahlan in this episode of…
21 - Monster Hunter International by Larry Correia
Sep 18, 2017 • 107 min
Episode 21 is brought to you by vampires, pistols, werewolves, sub-machine guns, boobs, automatic rifles, orcs, elves in trailer parks, RPGs, hulking Liefeld drawings come to life, more guns, and names based on guns. Hope you like guns and locally…
20 - Murder Gone A-Rye by Nancy J. Parra
Aug 3, 2017 • 91 min
Chris & Paris learn that a gluten-free themed murder mystery book exists. Naturally, they couldn’t resist reading such a bizarrely specific thing. Topics discussed include people who ”don’t-have-celiac-but-are-intolerant-to-gluten’,…
19 - Dark Star: Confessions of a Rock Idol by Creston Mapes
Jul 11, 2017 • 94 min
This book has evangelical Christianity, drugged out rock stars, squeaky villains, and FREEDOM. Have you ever wanted to be converted to a religion by a crazy child fan who has written to you obsessively for nearly 20 years? And then marry her? Dark…
18 - Aeon Legion: Labyrinth by J.P. Beaubien
May 9, 2017 • 84 min
When a book opens with a Nazi coming through a time portal in a library in the year 2000, it’s easy to assume that the book will be pretty bad. Somehow, though, Aeon Legion: Labyrinth jumps through time to convince us that it is less than…
17 - Holy Cow by David Duchovny
Apr 4, 2017 • 66 min
David Duchovny is a female, teenage cow with a surprisingly good grasp on technology. In Holy Cow, he leads us on a journey through factory farming, Jewish stereotypes, and the Israel-Palestine conflict.
16 - Sleeping with the Fishes by Mary Janice Davidson
Feb 28, 2017 • 76 min
Dive with us into the cesspool of Boston Harbor where mermaids make out! Explore an aquarium imagined by someone who was there one time!
15 - The Art of the Deal by Donald Trump & Tony Schwartz
Jan 28, 2017 • 69 min
Chris wakes from his coma into a world of unprecedented horror.
14 - Moon People by Dale M. Courtney
Oct 18, 2015 • 54 min
Our 14th episode! Our current book is almost 800 pages, so it’s taking us a bit longer than usual to read this one. For now, enjoy the last episode we put out before our hiatus. We’ve risen from the dead just in time for Halloween. In this episode, we…
11 - Maradonia and the Seven Bridges by Gloria Tesch
Jul 18, 2015 • 112 min
We’ve returned to the fantasy realm with the first book in the Maradonia saga. It was written by a child/teenager. I know, I know - Terrible Book Club shouldn’t be attacking children! We’re not - we assure you. While this was written when the author…
03 - Wizard’s First Rule (Sword of Truth Series Book #1) by Terry Goodkind
Mar 30, 2015 • 97 min
Our third episode.
2 - Marked (House of Night Book #1) by Kristin Cast & P.C. Cast
Mar 20, 2015 • 82 min
In Episode Two, we begrudgingly drag ourselves through a sea of teen angst, slut shaming, poorly designed facial tattoos, and racial stereotyping in Kristin & P.C. Cast’s Marked. Come, join us in our misery. Content Warnings: The…
1 - The Overton Window by Glenn Beck with Kevin Balfe, Emily Bestler, and Jack Henderson
Mar 13, 2015 • 97 min
This one is for all of you who love conspiracies, chicken-and-waffles, and hot office temps. This was the first episode of Terrible Book Club that originally came into the world on Mar 13, 2015. We even did an ad for The Color of Air podcast!