Grownups Read Things They Wrote as Kids

Grownups Read Things They Wrote as Kids

www.grownupsreadthingstheywroteaskids.com
Remembering the good, the bad, and the awkward parts of growing up
“Naked hugs are the best” (Calgary)
Nov 6 • 38 min
Anastassia gives naked hugs, Khulud hunts for boys, Helen laments her evil step-grandmother, and much more. Recorded live at Yuk Yuk’s in Calgary. Show notesSupport GRTTWaK. Become a patron.Photos from our Calgary eventRate or review GRTTWaK in iTunesJoin…
“Witch with a capital B” (Victoria)
Oct 23 • 36 min
Sheila shares a wartime record, Gregory moves to a new city, Elyse compares humans to dinosaurs, and much more. Recorded live at the Victoria Event Centre in Victoria, BC. Show notesSupport GRTTWaK. Become a patron.Photos from our Victoria eventRate or…
“To bathe or not to bathe?” (St. Albert)
Oct 9 • 33 min
Jordan is outraged by citrus fruit, Millie explains how to live with a kangaroo, Jeannine writes a poem about hygiene, and much more. Recorded live at The Arden Theatre in St. Albert. Show notesSupport GRTTWaK. Become a patron.Photos from our St. Albert…
“Thinking about getting stoned” (Ottawa)
Sep 25 • 39 min
Todd worries that he’s sitting next to a corpse, Rose reads poems about unrequited love, Diane wishes upon a star, and much more. Recorded live at Yuk Yuk’s in Ottawa. Show notesSupport GRTTWaK. Become a patron.Photos from our Ottawa eventRate or review…
“Ten things I love about Matt” (Vancouver)
Sep 11 • 37 min
Zahida passes out during sex ed, Geoff writes a very Canadian spy story, Mandy gets a crush on the class president, and much more. Recorded live at the Rio Theatre in Vancouver. Show notesSupport GRTTWaK. Become a patron.Photos from our Vancouver…
“Brains are better than boobs” (St. Albert)
Aug 28 • 33 min
Maura contemplates puberty, Matt poops his pants, Michelle imagines a family of horses, and much more. Recorded live at The Arden Theatre in St. Albert. Show notesSupport GRTTWaK. Become a patron.Photos from our St. Albert eventRate or review GRTTWaK in…
“Kiss virgin” (Vancouver)
Aug 14 • 33 min
Ivy puts a flashlight in her mouth, Alex shares a jealous teen love letter, Jasmin kisses a boy in Stanley Park, and much more. Recorded live at the Rio Theatre in Vancouver. Show notesSupport GRTTWaK. Become a patron.Photos from our Vancouver eventRate…
“He was puberized” (Ottawa)
Jul 31 • 35 min
Michelle meets her cute penpal, Fadhili obsesses over Transformers, Marty shares a whale of a tale, and much more. Recorded live at Yuk Yuk’s in Ottawa.
“Single and ready to mingle” (Kitchener)
Jul 17 • 35 min
Elizabeth faces a betrayal, Nitica disagrees with the President of India, Nathan searches for loopholes, and much more. Recorded live at the Registry Theatre in Kitchener, ON.
“I practically broke my butt” (Sudbury)
Jul 3 • 34 min
Kayla mourns the passing of Napster, Matthew visits Death Cliff, Jessica writes love letters set in the future, and much more. Recorded live at Fromagerie Elgin in Sudbury.
“You are not a beefcake” (Toronto)
Jun 19 • 36 min
Sarah writes a fan letter to Dean Cain, Chandra has a steamy make-out session, Anuj shares a story about the human reproductive system, and much more. Recorded live at the Tranzac in Toronto.
“He went to Uranus” (Winnipeg)
Jun 5 • 30 min
Suzie explains why it’s good to lie (sometimes), Kameron wishes for a job with good pay, Carly and Lauren visit Planet Oreo, and much more. Recorded live at The Park Theatre in Winnipeg.
“Joey the Hormone” (Montréal)
May 22 • 35 min
Kate shaves her armpits, Jeffrey meets a religious blood cell, Mary publicly shames her father, and much more. Recorded live at La Sala Rossa in Montréal.
“Peanut butter is my universe” (Saskatoon)
May 8 • 34 min
Dylan fights giant tarantulas, Camille shares a message from the Pope about drugs, Luke tells an amazing story of survival in southern Montana, and much more. Recorded live at the Cosmo Seniors Center as part of Winterruption 2017.
“I’m pretty sure I missed his lips” (Regina)
Apr 24 • 38 min
Robyn meets a flying whale, Todd tells a cautionary tale about drugs and alcohol, Ashley gets a hug from Rob Thomas of Matchbox 20, and much more. Recorded live at The Artesian in Regina as part of Winterruption 2017.
“If you are lucky, you will die” (Kingston)
Apr 10 • 34 min
Wendy reflects on the Apollo 11 space mission, Chris writes horoscopes for his elementary school newsletter, Kristy dresses up as a prostitute for Halloween, and much more. Recorded live at The Mansion in Kingston.
“Love is like a terrifying blanket” (Toronto)
Mar 27 • 34 min
Frances writes love letters to a stranger, Tish vists planet Grammar, Matthew buys a discount turkey burger, and much more. Recorded live at the Tranzac in Toronto.
“My mom is nice. My dad is OK.” (Windsor)
Mar 13 • 36 min
Nellie crushes on fictional characters, Dan plays spin the bottle, Rachel learns a history lesson, and much more. Recorded live at The Rondo in Windsor, ON. This episode is brought to you by the CAMH One Brave Night for Mental Health challenge. Register…
“I will now talk about my sorrows” (Montréal)
Feb 27 • 34 min
Talia overcomes her shyness, Josh reads Indiana Jones fan fiction, Madeline crushes on her bandstand partner, and much more. Recorded live at La Sala Rossa in Montréal.
“Space yogurt” (Hamilton)
Feb 13 • 35 min
Breanne loses her temper, Jody writes a revenge poem, Ryan recaps game shows, and much more. Recorded live at The Spice Factory in Hamilton.
“Smiling is an infectious disease” (Toronto)
Jan 30 • 38 min
Bhoomika gets infected, Benj has a love affair with an inanimate object, Chelsea invents a menstruation detective, and much more. Recorded live in Toronto at the Tranzac club.
“Homemade birth movies” (Ottawa)
Jan 16 • 31 min
Cassandra explores Wicca, Adam avoids birth movies, Derek writes a food-based love poem, and much more. Recorded live at Yuk Yuk’s in Ottawa.
“God bless Green Day and Danny Williams” (Halifax)
Jan 2 • 36 min
Emilie gets a visit from the cow inseminator, Toni gets caught drinking, Jennifer writes fan fiction about public transit, and much more. Recorded live at The Company House in Halifax.
“Hello there, big boy” (Toronto)
Dec 19, 2016 • 37 min
John feels funny about Christmas carols, Roger moves to Canada, Esther writes mandatory letters from camp, and much more. Recorded live in Toronto at the Bloor Hot Docs Cinema as part of the inaugural Hot Docs Podcast Festival.
“Search my remains for more answers” (Montréal)
Dec 5, 2016 • 37 min
Jon runs away from home, Simon runs away from a drug rehab program, Kristen critiques Shakespeare, and much more. Recorded live at La Sala Rossa in Montréal.
“I love you more than chicken hearts” (Calgary)
Nov 21, 2016 • 33 min
Song pulls a telemarketing prank, Rebecca obsesses over Justin Timberlake, Melanie makes a “special friend” at camp, and much more. Recorded live in Calgary, AB.
“Looks old in a hot way” (Ottawa)
Nov 7, 2016 • 35 min
Susan steals vegetables, Glenn goes bumper-hitching, Claire reads an angry letter addressed to math, and much more. Recorded live in Ottawa, ON.
“We’re not dating. We’re just in love with each other.” (Vancouver)
Oct 24, 2016 • 32 min
Tara writes a letter to her future self, Ron loves and lusts in vain, Felicia and Skylar discuss hookups, and much more. Recorded live in Vancouver, BC.
“My yearly love attack” (Whitehorse)
Oct 10, 2016 • 34 min
George might be a bowling addict, Laurel suggests ways to improve Whitehorse, Andrew takes care of his baby brother, and much more. Recorded live at the Old Fire Hall in Whitehorse, Yukon. Co-presented by BYTE Empowering Youth.
“Stages of horniness” (Toronto)
Sep 26, 2016 • 31 min
Rachel plans a skinny-dipping prank, Josh writes a very formal love note, Dianne mashes up fairy tales, and much more. Recorded live at the Tranzac Club in Toronto.
“The first time I’d seen a real one” (Yellowknife)
Sep 12, 2016 • 31 min
Maureen contemplates losing her virginity, Rajiv writes a lullabye about the Iran-Contra affair, Kimberley shares a steamy shower scene, and much more. Recorded live at the Black Knight Pub in Yellowknife, NWT.
“Who needs boobs? I don’t.” (Edmonton)
Aug 29, 2016 • 35 min
Jamie lists things (and people) she hates, Nora and Stanley find love in the feminine hygiene aisle, Carlito writes a song about girl repellent, and much more. Recorded live at the Mercury Room in Edmonton, AB.
“My love floats lonely as a feather” (Vancouver)
Aug 15, 2016 • 30 min
Bernadette makes a silent vow, Omar rebels against middle school propaganda, Willow writes an obituary, and much more. Recorded live at the Biltmore Cabaret in Vancouver, BC.
“What’s with all these freaking nudists?” (Toronto)
Aug 1, 2016 • 35 min
Nikki fights to end cruelty in nursery rhymes, Brent is different when he’s alone, Chris watches late-night erotica on TV, and much more. Recorded live at the Tranzac in Toronto, ON.
“We play smoochie-pie on the couch” (Winnipeg)
Jul 18, 2016 • 31 min
Lexi visits the Czech Republic, Gabrielle finds herself in a love square, Carson meets the monster from the Black Lagoon, and much more. Recorded live at the Park Theatre in Winnipeg, MB.
“You stole my electron” (Regina)
Jul 4, 2016 • 33 min
Evan writes a letter to Wayne’s World, Sabrina tells a terrifying tale about a murderous English teacher, Kaylee grabs her crush’s balls, and much more. Recorded live at the Artesian in Regina, SK.
“Love me, bananas” (Montréal)
Jun 20, 2016 • 32 min
Shelby worries about evil bananas, Patrick visits another planet, Simone stops indenting, and much more. Recorded live at La Sala Rossa in Montréal, QC.
“I’m not one of those psycho girls” (Vancouver)
Jun 6, 2016 • 30 min
Heidi tries to keep things above the neck, Cam rips off a classic fable, Elena writes a letter to Prince William, and much more. Recorded live at the Biltmore Cabaret in Vancouver, BC.
“Don’t let the bed bugs get you pregnant” (Victoria)
May 23, 2016 • 36 min
Carolyn finds an envelope full of nude photos, Preeti questions her faith, Rob and Trish read their love letters from 42 years ago, and much more. Recorded live at the Victoria Event Centre in Victoria, BC.
“I would totally date you if I wasn’t you” (Saskatoon)
May 9, 2016 • 30 min
Barry gets a “hard-on” during The Ed Sullivan Show, Katherine weighs the pros and cons of losing her virginity, Danica files a report about the new trend of karaoke, and much more. Recorded live at The Refinery in Saskatoon, SK.
“We looked and smelled deadly” (Halifax)
Apr 25, 2016 • 35 min
Renee finds herself in an 8th-grade love triangle, Gordon writes short fiction about crime-fighting insects, Sarah confesses to petty crime, and much more. Recorded live at The Company House in Halifax, NS.
“Nothing is sexier than teamwork” (Toronto)
Apr 11, 2016 • 33 min
Heather and Bianca share dating advice, Josh reads Zelda-themed short fiction, Mary Jean almost gets stood up, and and much more. Recorded live at the Tranzac Club in Toronto, ON.
“I hugged with girls today” (Winnipeg)
Mar 28, 2016 • 32 min
Karleigh threatens the Tooth Fairy, Kaj reads a comic book about giant mutant beavers, Jen writes a letter to the Prime Minister, and much more. Recorded live at the Park Theatre n Winnipeg, MB.
“Virginity is like a birthday cake” (Calgary)
Mar 14, 2016 • 31 min
Terra compares virginity to a birthday cake, Bradley explains how to find a rock, Mary plans to “bump off” a nun, and much more. Recorded live at Yuk Yuk’s in Calgary, AB.
“At least I know I’m fertile” (Halifax)
Feb 29, 2016 • 32 min
Erin laments being a late bloomer, Jenna reads her last will and testament, Michelle takes an east-coast-themed acid trip, and much more. Recorded live at The Company House in Halifax, NS.
“Nonfat lattes and decaf dreams” (Montréal)
Feb 14, 2016 • 38 min
James wishes for a spray tan, Jessie reads jokes without punchlines, Zach shares a tale of unrequited love, and much more. Recorded live at La Sala Rossa in Montréal.
“Things to do with your menstrual blood” (Toronto)
Jan 31, 2016 • 33 min
Olive lists things to do with your menstrual blood, Shirley describes a terrifying solar eclipse, Jeff reveals his secret soap opera obsession, and much more. Recorded live at the Tranzac in Toronto. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes:…
“Everyone thinks I’m a pothead” (Montréal)
Jan 16, 2016 • 36 min
Misha predicts his own death, Jeffrey obsesses about goldfish, Sarah worries that people think she’s a pothead, and much more. Recorded live at La Sala Rossa in Montréal. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: https://goo.gl/BKe1ov Join the email newsletter:…
“Here are four jokes; three of them dirty” (Ottawa)
Jan 3, 2016 • 35 min
Terry sets sexual goals at a church youth group, Karen deals with a dead bird, Dirk reads letters from camp written in the 1930s, and much more. Recorded live at Yuk Yuk’s in Ottawa, ON. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/jeuWTI Join the…
227: “Before I die, I want to have sex” (Toronto)
Dec 19, 2015 • 32 min
Heather gets a fart-related nickname, Andru takes a risky trip to second base, Brian writes a sharply worded letter to the editor, and much more. Recorded live at The Tranzac Club in Toronto, ON. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: https://goo.gl/ZwTjst…
226: “Wearing a cape and farting” (Winnipeg)
Dec 6, 2015 • 40 min
Angie finds out why lingerie is the devil, Inayat explains how to defeat bullies, Brady recounts an Olympic drug scandal, and much more. Recorded live at the Park Theatre in Winnipeg, MB. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: https://goo.gl/POz5vG Join the…
225: “I will not attack Nicholas” (London)
Nov 22, 2015 • 35 min
Angsty breakup poetry, an interview with a “dirty old man,” and World War 3 at Santa’s house. Recorded live at the London Music Club in London, ON. ## Links ## Elyse’s drawing of her mom, pre and post-spa: https://goo.gl/3XLlzT Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes:…
224: “A pornographic magazine hidden in a pile of wood” (Kitchener)
Nov 8, 2015 • 31 min
Drunken necking, deep misunderstandings about the Catholic church, and a dirty magazine hidden in a pile of wood. Recorded live at The Registry Theatre in Kitchener, ON. ## Links ## GRTTWaK Winnipeg (matinee): http://goo.gl/iFb1aU Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes:…
223: “Wieners are stupid and so is health class” (Ottawa)
Oct 25, 2015 • 34 min
A champion high-jumping snake, an underwhelming sex ed class, and what it’s like to work in a cemetery. Recorded live at Yuk Yuk’s in Ottawa, ON. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/pi3Ek3 Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/4y38tp Upcoming…
222: “A couple of popped-out eyeballs” (Winnipeg)
Oct 11, 2015 • 32 min
Plans for revenge, poetry about chicken pox, and and backhanded compliments in the form of career advice. Recorded live at the Kings’s Head Pub in Winnipeg, MB. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: https://goo.gl/xbWjGw Join the mailing list:…
221: “Gone are my days of hedonism and mediocrity” (Yellowknife)
Sep 27, 2015 • 34 min
Weak bladders, friends of the forest, and a proven strategy for dealing with bullies. Recorded live at the Black Knight Pub in Yellowknife, NT. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/swuUg3 Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/M32ZX7 Upcoming…
220: “We are getting away with murder since you left” (Edmonton)
Sep 13, 2015 • 31 min
A report on flying cows, an acrostic poem music video request, and a collection of bizarre elementary school aphorisms. Recorded live at the Mercury Room in Edmonton, AB. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: https://goo.gl/duVGq4 Join the mailing list:…
219: “Why is Dad being a bum?” (Calgary)
Aug 30, 2015 • 33 min
An elementary school detective agency, teenage infidelity, and an urgent desire to shave your legs. Recorded live at Broken City in Calgary, AB. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/83A07W Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/5cbGT3 Upcoming…
218: “Be careful of anyone named Trina” (St. John’s)
Aug 17, 2015 • 31 min
Childhood revenge fantasies, a fake newspaper article, and a journal entry written directly to God. Recorded live at The Rocket Room in St. John’s, NL. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/83A07W Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/vr9iGr…
217: “I’m crying while I write this letter” (Halifax)
Aug 2, 2015 • 33 min
A secret spy club, haiku about death, and a murder-mystery coming out story. Recorded live at The Company House in Halifax, NS. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/g0aPTF Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/7vPxhJ Upcoming live events:…
216: “Today is breeding day” (Charlottetown)
Jul 18, 2015 • 34 min
Poetry about the female reproductive system, a violent Easter story, and accidental animal erotica. Recorded live at The Guild in Charlottetown, PE. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/VlQ3px Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/XbkCdl…
215: “It’s not a cult!” (Detroit)
Jul 5, 2015 • 31 min
Firearm accidents, a speech for Bill Gates, and a step-by-step guide to popularity. Recorded live at Cliff Bell’s in Detroit, MI. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: https://goo.gl/qK5ndx Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/ZbF6Ve Upcoming live events:…
214: “Someone pooed in the pool” (Toronto)
Jun 21, 2015 • 37 min
Letters to the tooth fairy, stolen baseball tickets, and advice on keeping (and losing) your virginity. Recorded live at the Gladstone Hotel Ballroom in Toronto, ON. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: https://goo.gl/uegNAn Join the mailing list:…
213: “You live and you learn” (Windsor)
Jun 7, 2015 • 32 min
Breaking up, getting fired, and dissing your home country. Recorded live at Phog Lounge in Windsor, ON. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/beoEWq Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/7XsDkm Upcoming live events: http://goo.gl/yeYP6a Shannon…
212: “Mom always said MSN was the devil” (Toronto)
May 24, 2015 • 36 min
A Jim Carrey obsession, Gulf War analysis from an 11-year-old, and the most intense love letter you’ll ever hear. Recorded live at the Gladstone Hotel Ballroom in Toronto, ON. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/xHLCxb Join the mailing list:…
211: “Stabbing each other with our insecurities” (Vancouver)
May 10, 2015 • 36 min
Angry LiveJournal entries, a poem about losing your virginity, and a dead moose carcass. Recorded live at Electric Owl Social Club in Vancouver, BC. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/xHLCxb Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f…
210: “Fires are not nice! Fires hurt!” (Victoria)
Apr 26, 2015 • 36 min
Childhood pyrophobia, a sister pact, and a plan to rid the world of nuclear bombs. Recorded live at the Victoria Event Centre in Victoria, BC. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/xHLCxb Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f Upcoming…
209: “Stupit and dumb and especially ugly” (Hamilton)
Apr 12, 2015 • 35 min
Dead hamsters, spin the bottle, and the truth about NYC. Recorded live at the Spice Factory in Hamilton, Ontario. ## Links ## Rate GRTTWaK in iTunes: http://goo.gl/xHLCxb Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f Upcoming live events:…
208: “Backslide into lust” (Calgary)
Mar 28, 2015 • 33 min
Passive-aggressive poetry, sex in the 1980s, and a really great first date. Recorded live at Broken City in Calgary, Alberta. ## Links ## Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f Upcoming live shows: http://goo.gl/XsQENQ Twitter:…
207: “Half-baked psycho pervert” (Banff)
Mar 14, 2015 • 35 min
Phantom killer kittens, a fight over an $800 phone bill, and an island with no babes. Recorded live at The Club in Banff, Alberta. ## Links ## Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f Upcoming live shows: http://goo.gl/XsQENQ Twitter:…
206: “I had a mucus problem” (Toronto)
Feb 19, 2015 • 34 min
Teenage makeout fantasies, financial advice from a 9-year-old, and what it’s like to be friend-dumped, twice. Recorded live at The Garrison in Toronto, Ontario. ## Links ## Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f Upcoming live shows:…
205: “Hayrides and other indignities” (Ottawa)
Feb 8, 2015 • 35 min
Unsolicited apology notes, vampire-inspired poetry, and political analysis from a 9-year-old. Recorded live at the Bytown Tavern in Ottawa, Ontario. ## Links ## Join the mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f Upcoming live shows: http://goo.gl/XsQENQ Twitter:…
204: “I don’t even know what hormones are!” (Windsor)
Jan 25, 2015 • 35 min
Hot dog obsession, Canada-U.S. relations, and falling in love with a waiter. Recorded live at Phog Lounge in Windsor, Ontario. ## Links ## Upcoming live shows: http://goo.gl/XsQENQ GRTTWaK mailing list: http://goo.gl/xcgA6f Dan’s journal soundtrack:…
203: “My new nickname is ‘mouth’”(Toronto)
Jan 18, 2015 • 36 min
A bald eagle, war between Canada and China, and lots of French kissing. Recorded live at The Garrison in Toronto, Ontario.
202: “My hand was all the way on her butt” (Halifax)
Jan 11, 2015 • 35 min
Dead chickens, embarrassing erections, and a childhood overdose of vitamin C. Recorded live at The Company House in Halifax, Nova Scotia.
201: “I was 9, but I was tough” (Montreal)
Jan 4, 2015 • 36 min
Season 2 kicks off with teenage existential angst, a visit with Ronald Reagan, and a few questions about Jesus. Recorded live at La Vitrola in Montreal, QC.
Welcome to the new GRTTWaK podcast feed
Dec 16, 2014 • 10 min
Brand new episodes of Grownups Read Things They Wrote as Kids are coming in early 2015, and you’ll find them right here, in our new podcast feed. Welcome aboard! Subscribe with iTunes: https://itun.es/i6gJ9HR Subscribe with RSS:…