Zero Percent Scared

Zero Percent Scared
Where science meets the paranormal

49: Blue Eyed Death Rays
Feb 21 • 36 min
aka The Evil Eye
48: La Llorona and her fireball fang baby
Feb 15 • 48 min
Also, postpartum depression
47: Bizarro News Roundup
Jan 31 • 20 min
Sea fairies, talking mummies and dark matter = ghosts!
46: Mass Hysteria!! We hate that term!!
Jan 24 • 41 min
Meowing Nuns, Dancing Plagues, Dogs and Cats living together!
45: Ed and Lorraine Warren - a diabolically adorable couple
Jan 17 • 33 min
Authentic ghost-busters or charlatans? DISCUSS!
44: Listener Stories take 2
Jan 9 • 36 min
You guys scare us!! We love you!
43: Drug Bushes and Wormholes (time slips)
Jan 2 • 42 min
You guys, time is so weird and wiggly
42: Krampus: The Christmas hell-demon
Dec 26, 2019 • 19 min
We explore the dark side of Christmas
41: Sonic boom Santa and his flaming reindeer
Dec 19, 2019 • 43 min
So is Santa real? No, I’m serious, really, is he?
40: The Winchester Mansion
Dec 12, 2019 • 36 min
aka most amazing house in the galaxy
39: Ed, make me an alien love castle
Dec 5, 2019 • 35 min
Coral Castle is a relatively unknown marvel of the world, in the dangly part of Florida, made by a tiny malnourished tubercular man all by himself. Tons and tons of giant carved stone placed in this creepy love shrine either through some sort of alien…
38: Get in the canoe, Steve! (the lost colony of Roanoke)
Nov 28, 2019 • 38 min
Happy Thanksgiving to all you awesome people! To celebrate, we’re covering the Lost Colony of Roanoke and what sounds like a whole bunch of people getting yelled at to hurry the eff up to get into boats. Email us with your creepy deathbed words at…
37: Ghostly Love Hugs (Guardian Angels)
Nov 22, 2019 • 51 min
Guardian angels are rad, even if they’re just hallucinations from the temporoparietal junction. Say yes to ghostly love hugs no to floating intestines. This week we’re talking about Guardian Angels and the 3rd man effect. Email us with encounters YOU have…
36: Black Eyed Rude AF Kids
Nov 14, 2019 • 44 min
Guys, eyes are the CREEPIEST. Do you know what’s creepier than just normal eyes? Giant iris black eyes. On children. Like bad willow, but eerie AF. Join us today as we cover BLACK EYED KIDS, and just FYI you’re totally allowed to slam the door in their…
35: Bunnyman Bunnyman Bunnyman!
Nov 7, 2019 • 33 min
According to the internet, every single bridge is haunted. But the most haunted of the bridges is definitely bunnyman bridge. Sounds cute right? Well jokes on you, because that bunny has an axe and isn’t afraid to use it. But let’s be honest, still pretty…
34: Let’s Do Clowns Tonight
Oct 31, 2019 • 40 min
First of all: HAPPY HALLOWEEN MY PEOPLE! Second: It’s unanimous, nobody likes clowns. Or Disney World. OK fine that last one is just Kelly, but the clown thing is real. Especially when they’re trying to murder you. Let’s phase out the clowns, people.…
33: Shut up, Jodi (Amityville Horror)
Oct 24, 2019 • 36 min
Join us as we discuss the true(ish) Amityville Horror story! Did demonic forces drive the Lutz family from their murder house? Get the facts and Kelly’s review of the movie here! Spoiler — she isn’t a fan. Also, email us, peeps!…
32: The Haunted Monkey Situation
Oct 17, 2019 • 37 min
Have you seen Pet Sematary? No? Cool definitely keep it that way. We have some NUTS animal stories for you. Nature is metal. Ghost dogs are metal. email us! [email protected] Full show notes at
31: Zombies: Definitely Real!
Oct 10, 2019 • 49 min
GUYS. We’re back and it’s the most paranormal month of the year! Tune in to hear about how the Zombie Apocalypse is definitely inevitable and all about crazy drugs that apparently you can only get in Florida. email us! [email protected]
30: Mad (Cool) Scientists
Sep 13, 2019 • 38 min
Nobel laureates totally dig the paranormal!! Ok maybe just a few of them do…but still. We talk about Francis Crick’s love of panspermia, Charles Richet’s devotion to extrasensory perception, and Ray Kurzweil’s tech predictions and commitment to…
29: Kristina Semos, Astrologer Extraordinaire
Sep 5, 2019 • 28 min
We have a real astrologer with us today, Kristina Semos! Kristina specializes in astrology and essential oils and schools us on the planets, the truth about daily horoscopes and getting all your energy crap “on sale”. Note: Episode was recorded in July…
28: Gingers == Atlanteans
Aug 29, 2019 • 52 min
Get ready for more agreement on a topic then you’ve ever heard. And Mendelian genetics. Also red heads. And aliens. Red headed aliens. On this week’s episode we discuss the evidence pointing to the truth of Atlantis!! We love hearing from you, so email…
27: The Scariest, Deviliest Triangle!
Aug 22, 2019 • 43 min
Whats a vile vortex, you ask? It’s a triangle where crazy stuff happens! You thought it was just the Bermuda triangle but there are SO MANY MORE TRIANGLES. But not really, most of them seem pretty normal. Or maybe it’s aliens. Probably aliens. All our…
26: Incompetent Floor Ghosts
Aug 15, 2019 • 47 min
Ever found a Jesus on your grilled cheese? Toast with your mom’s face on it? Well, these small-town Spaniards have faces popping up on their freaking floor! Just throw a rug on it people. Throw a rug on it. Very special thanks for today’s topic suggestion…
25: Tinder for Vampires
Aug 8, 2019 • 42 min
Email us! [email protected] We’ve talked about pop culture vamps, and old school vamps, but what about modern-day blood drinkers? Well, good old Stephen Kaplan delved into this back in the 1970s in his Vampire Research Center, which really…
24: Rad Listener Stories
Aug 2, 2019 • 25 min
Today we talk about our favorite listener stories! Guys, you’re THE best. Keep sending us your scary and paranormal experiences and Kelly will keep ranking the best things to haunt. Dolls, dogs, footballs, doors, lamps.
23: Vampires, corpses, and our freaky AF circulatory system
Jul 22, 2019 • 60 min
Does anyone actually believe in vampires? No, right? Well if you do, don’t worry, eBay and goop have you covered with vampire hunting kits and anti-vamp elixir! Thanks Gwyneth! On this episode we discuss the insane vampire panics in Eastern Europe! FYI…
22: Buffy vs Twilight (answer: Buffy)
Jul 15, 2019 • 42 min
This went from a conversation about TV to a giant feminist rant so get excited people. Main question for the listeners: Are straight women actually super into being stalked by pasty emo dudes? Please tell us, we want to understand you! Full show notes…
21: Taurus Rising (whatever that means)
Jul 8, 2019 • 57 min
The People’s Choice Podcast Awards - Who doesn’t love a newspaper horoscope? You know you read them. Don’t even pretend. We’re all bff here. Once you’re done reading your horoscope, make an opposite friend! Also, Evangeline…
20: Tarot, like Carrot
Jul 1, 2019 • 40 min
We all know by now that Dr. Kelly loves a good tarot card reading. And being a “gifted psychic”, she can tell you that your future holds a lighthearted overview of tarot cards AND a heated fight about statistics. Oh and also, you’re all going to have a…
19: Slenderman Mania!
Jun 24, 2019 • 52 min
Guys. Middle school is the actual worst. Slenderman, a creepy suit-wearing string bean, has apparently figured out how to fill the middle school emotional void causing full on murder-spree inspiring obsessions. Join us to hear all about the darkness…
18: Even haunted elevators are very safe
Jun 16, 2019 • 28 min
On this mini-episode, we discuss several haunted elevators across the nation, what the deal is with skipping floor numbers in elevators, and Kelly’s secret weirdo love for elevator engineering. Conclusions: Apparently, elevators are really safe although…
17: Ghosts, mold, and those gd physicists
Jun 10, 2019 • 62 min
Most people believe in ghosts, but is it just wishful thinking? Or are we all just living in moldy, infrasound ridden houses with a creepy neighbor who pops in to freak out children? Full show notes at!
16: You can curse anything, especially dolls
Jun 3, 2019 • 41 min
This is more of a medium-sode but whatever, right? There are a lot of cursed things out there, people. Dolls are creepy AF. Apparently so are giant diamonds. Kelly will take all the cursed diamonds off your hands (but none of your haunted dolls! Send…
15 - The Curse of Bathsheba Ruggles
May 26, 2019 • 49 min
Has Kelly been cursed by her murderous ancestor, Bathsheba? And if so did her over the top witch ceremony lift the curse for her and all the Ruggles women? For once we both agree - definitely real! Also, we spill the tea on epigenetics!
Luck of the Irish…and that one Croatian dude (ep 14, Minisode 6)
May 19, 2019 • 28 min
Do you think you’re a lucky person? Apparently, we both think we are! Sarah is clearly lucky because of her commitment to superstitions and lucky charms and Kelly’s luck is I guess is just because she’s Irish? Full show notes and links at…
13 - Riot Girls at Sea
May 13, 2019 • 68 min
GUYS. This is SO exciting. Mermen, mermaids, dugongs, manatees. This is the topic that started it all people. Join us today as we discuss Sarah’s real life Merman sighting, plus all the evidence for or against aquatic humanoids!!!
Watch Bray Road Beast with us (ep 12, Minisode 5)
May 6, 2019 • 32 min
This experimental minisode has us live watching the documentary “The Bray Road Beast”. We have a cute dog in attendance and wine on hand, so listen up then go get the dang thing and watch!
11 - Real Life Incredibles
Apr 28, 2019 • 50 min
This week, we try and recover from the bummer of satanic panic with superpowers! Super smellers, folks who are strong AF, bones that never break, perfect memories and mega-athletes to name a few. We also talk about a whole mess of genetics, get excited…
The Total Absurdity of the Satanic Panic (ep 10, Minisode 4)
Apr 21, 2019 • 33 min
This episode was sort of a bummer, sorry folks. Major take homes: the Satanic Panic was bonkers, go nuts with the heavy metal and DnD, and our memories, for the most part, suck. On this minisode, we talk about the 80s Satanic Panic and how insane and…
9 - Love Spells are a Hard No
Apr 15, 2019 • 52 min
Everyone wanted to be a witch in middle school, am I right? Also, who wants to help design a science experiment to measure the global consciousness effects on reality? Come on! You know you want to. This episode Sarah and Kelly discuss magical spells and…
8 - Don’t Buy Haunted Houses, Nic! (Minisode 3)
Apr 8, 2019 • 28 min
What do Nicolas Cage and serial killer Delphine LaLaurie have in common? A shared (haunted) residence in New Orleans, of course! On Today’s minisode, hear a recap of Sarah’s spooky trip, the best of New Orleans paranormal and quality Nic Cage trivia. Show…
7 - Houdini for President
Mar 31, 2019 • 41 min
On this week’s episode, we talk about something we actually agree on - how awesome Harry Houdini is! Hardcore skeptic and illusionist extraordinaire, listen to hear why we love him so — with ADORABLE ANIMAL STORIES! Full show notes at…
6 - Possession … it’ll make your head spin - (Minisode 2)
Mar 24, 2019 • 25 min
Minisode #2 continues the Ouija theme from last week. This week we present: A scary college Ouija tale courtesy of our good friend Manny, plus the terrifying TRUE story that inspired the movie THE EXORCIST! Never fear skeptics, we’ve got the lowdown on…
5 - Get it together, Spirits!
Mar 16, 2019 • 50 min
Should Kelly burn an Ouija board? Should Sarah chill the eff out and let Kelly burn an Ouija board? On this episode, we cover the history of the scariest piece of cardboard in existence — the OUIJA BOARD! Join us for disturbing tales of people consumed by…
4 -Murder House Hypothesis - (Minisode 1)
Mar 9, 2019 • 19 min
Email us! [email protected] Full show notes at: On today’s first official minisode, Kelly gives us the lowdown on the scientific method. Tune in to learn what a real-life scientist thinks about tiny invisible…
3 - Heal me, Crystals!
Feb 27, 2019 • 47 min
Can crystals cure a coma? Does putting porous rocks in your genitals increase your sex drive? Can amber necklaces reduce teething pain? Was Sarah a gem-stealing adolescent? Listen to hear answers to these questions and more!…
2 - Werewolf Community Board
Feb 27, 2019 • 27 min
Do werewolves have meetings to discuss how to avoid human detection? When will one go rogue? (Answer: Never, because they’re not real). In this episode, we continue the creepy canine theme with an introduction to the DOGMAN! They are eeeeeeverywhere! Full…
1 - Bring it, Skinwalkers!
Feb 27, 2019 • 41 min
Are werewolves just lonely lions? Should Kelly stop instigating skinwalkers? Does mold cause everything paranormal? In this episode, we discuss the history of werewolves, insane diseases that cause people to think they’re animals, and the Beast of…