Intimate Interactions

Intimate Interactions

intimatepodcast.com
Improve your relationships, get confident asking for what you really want, and have more intimate, satisfying sex! These lessons from non monogamy and consensual kink can improve any relationship and help you connect more with yourself and others. Check out https://intimatepodcast.com


Growing up in Vancouver in the 60s (My Dad)
Aug 1 • 59 min
My father visited from India recently. He turns 70 in 9 days. With chronic fatigue, heart attacks, and trans-ischemic attacks - they’re like ministrokes - I felt a sense of urgency to connect with him. I invited him to podcast about his childhood as it…
Coaching for Pleasurable Anal Sex (Jazz Goldman)
Jul 25 • 58 min
Because giving anal sex is my primary form of penetrative sexual expression, it became essential for me to make it easier and pleasurable for others. Coaching someone who is receiving anal sex is more an art than a science, but there are certain skills…
110 - Grief and Emotional Intelligence in a Pandemic (Yana Skorstengaard)
Jul 24 • 61 min
Life Interrupted. I think that’s the title of the chapter of the memoirs I’ll never write about 2019 and 2020. The novel coronavirus has probably produced more global anxiety, depression, stress, and grief than just about any other single event I can…
Crime and Self Relationship (Yana Skorstengaard)
Jul 18 • 58 min
Today, Yana Skorstengaard, a masters candidate at the University of Ottawa in criminology discusses how we relate to crime and are intimate with the criminal punishment. It has the power to come into our lives and take everything we have. We trust that it…
Healing from Traumatic Power Exchange (Jazz Goldman)
Jul 11 • 70 min
Trauma is everywhere, even in power exchange. Relationships can be traumatic, and total power exchange is no different. Healing can take years and adversely affect relationships, kink, and sex. When processing trauma, I think it’s important to work…
Social Leadership During Isolation (Yana Skorstengaard)
Jul 10 • 60 min
What cultural change would improve the health and wellness of your society? Today we chat with Yana about cultural ideas such as retributive or punitive justice - Yana is a criminology researcher after all - and discuss social leadership. When I’m gaming…
Self Relationship and Suicidality (Dax)
Jul 4 • 64 min
This month we’ve focused a lot on two alternating threads in the show: more talking about sex, and more talking about the relationship to oneself. As I try to tackle harder concepts and try recording more outside and in less ideal environments, I’m…
How Can Bad Butt Sex Get Better (Jazz Goldman)
Jun 27 • 53 min
Anal sex is one of my favourite topics because I enjoy giving anal sex, and have recently been attempting to enjoy receiving anal sex with limited success. Jazz Goldman is also a veteran of giving anal sex to others but they have recently become quite…
Depression Coping Strategies (Dax)
Jun 20 • 45 min
“If you say mental wellness three times, some asshole in a ‘Live, Love, Laugh’ t-shirt will appear and tell you to go outside.” - sign at BitF 2019 Relationship to the self is critical when considering mental wellness. Often we think of that relationship…
Keep Vulnerable People Happy to Stop COVID-19 (Yana Skorstengaard)
Jun 19 • 45 min
Hi Intimates. Today we’re talking with Yana, the criminology researcher, about why it’s important we start looking at issues like homelessness and the conditions in prisons. If we each of us is to be safe in our quarantine from COVID-19, the sooner we…
Making White Spaces Safer for Racial Minorities (Jazz Goldman)
Jun 13 • 52 min
Alternative relationship spaces like polyamory groups or kink organizations sometimes struggle to see when Racism is going on in the space because it tends to be more subtle than traditional violence. Jazz Goldman is a mixed Black-Jewish American, and I’m…
Allhallowtide and Diwali (Irene)
Jun 6 • 97 min
Note: This episode published a day early so it could be in time for Halloween even though it’s focused primarily on Diwali. As time goes on I’m going to continue to try to rush themed episodes to you in time for the appropriate dates but may not always be…
How Racey Is Whiteness (Jazz Goldman)
May 30 • 49 min
Race is a complicated topic to discuss, because there are quite a few misconceptions out there. I want to tackle how white a lot of alternative spaces are because of how inhospitable they can be for people of colour. This episode discusses what races are,…
Depression and Self Relationship (Dax)
May 23 • 44 min
Person on the internet: “Wow you’re so mature for your age.” Other person on the internet: “Thanks, it’s the lifetime of depression and self-isolation.” Intimate Interactions is about relationships and intimacy. I can’t think of a more important…
Long Distance Lovers and Jealousy (Jazz Goldman)
May 16 • 67 min
Have you ever heard of non monogamous people having “comet” partners? Today we’ll discuss what that means and how it’s different from long distance relationships. Jazz Goldman and I talk about what a comet partner relationship might look like between the…
Friendships among Men (Maita)
May 9 • 70 min
Maita is a men’s coach living in Victoria who teaches healthy relationships between men. We talk about emotional labour, exercises you can do with your friends or at home, strategies with intimate partners, socially acceptable ways men share intimacy with…
What Are We? (Jazz Goldman)
May 2 • 63 min
Relationships can be thought of as strategies for meeting our human needs with each other. They can also be thought of as the sum of our interactions. That might sound complicated - and it is! That’s why it’s much easier to think of them in cookie-cutter,…
Liminality and Sex Education Concepts for Children (Tillie King)
Apr 25 • 78 min
Welcome to the second session of the Tillie-Victor Friendship Project - or TVFP. We’re recording outdoor sessions documenting our friendship as it progresses. This is a continuation of our first session and as such it was accidentally recorded on our H1N…
Intersex, Intergender Intellectual (Jazz Goldman)
Apr 18 • 65 min
It’s my pleasure to talk more with Jazz Goldman today, an intersex human, friend of mine, ocassional sex partner of mine, and professional cuddler for cuddlist. Suffice it to say they have a really informed and interesting perspective on intimacy, sex,…
Robots, Capitalism, and STIs (Tillie King)
Apr 11 • 58 min
Today I begin an experimental piece called the Tillie Friendship Project. Inspired by Audio Smut and The Heart podcasts, I got an H1N Zoom mic, the newer version of what Kaitlin Prest started with when recording Audio Smut. Seriously, if you’ve never…
Are We Proud of Pride (Jazz Goldman)
Apr 4 • 67 min
Jazz Goldman and I just went to Pride. Jazz is a friend of mine, an ocassional sex partner of mine, a professional cuddler for cuddlist, all about the performing arts, and all about community building. Jazz and I have in common being some flavor of gender…
Overcoming the Good Girl Within (Kat Stark)
Mar 28 • 69 min
Kat’s back for another session. This time, we talk about their experience of people pleasing and worthlessness. Kat describes the ideal of being a “wantless angel” that spends their time satisfying other people’s needs and wants. It may sound awful, but…
The 5 Dollar Burger Boy (Kris Perry)
Mar 21 • 79 min
Kris Perry is back to talk about parents, trauma, fear of intimacy, and the boy from the Wendy’s parking lot. She came to the recording session directly from his house. I mention my partners in this session. I talk about the importance of trying again and…
Antinatalism, Wanderlust, and Free Speech (Stephanie Si)
Mar 14 • 90 min
Stephanie is a woman of colour who has been an engineer and an accountant. She identifies as asexual or possibly a demisexual, and an ASMR content producer - though none happen in this episode. She has a passion for travel and politics. She brings up the…
Suburban Housewives and Jealousy (Lisa and Paula)
Mar 7 • 47 min
Lisa and Paula are back again: two monogamous, vanilla, heterosexual women of colour in their 40s. They’re successful entrepreneurs and mothers and wives who met during their MBA programs at UBC. This session turned into suburban housewives curious about…
Mental Health and Intimate Strategies (Chelsey Blair)
Feb 29 • 58 min
How’s your mental wellness doing today? Have you been getting enough self care lately? I’ve been somewhat sick and am probably going to cough through this episode. Our conversation this episode will focus on mental wellness in relationships and how trauma…
Attraction, Arousal, and Orgasm (Lisa and Paula)
Feb 22 • 52 min
Lisa and Paula are back: two monogamous, vanilla, heterosexual women of colour in their 40s. They’re successful mothers, wives, and entrepreneurs who met during their MBA programs at UBC. They were super interested to talk more about the results of their…
Sex, Politics, and Trauma (Chelsey Blair)
Feb 15 • 63 min
Today we meet Chelsey, a person working towards a Social Work degree at UNBC. She is a cisgender white queer femme who is anarchist leaning and is currently working as one of the humans pioneering conflict resolution strategies in a survivor support role.…
Nonmonogamy, Independence, Cuddling (Reid Mihalko)
Feb 14 • 41 min
This Valentine’s day, I bring you a special interview that I got with Reid Mihalko. Normally new episodes publish on Patreon first and come out for free 9 months later. This episode is an exception and will air for everyone on Valentine’s day. If you find…
Service and Burnout (Tillie King)
Feb 8 • 58 min
Most of us have probably experienced burnout. It can look like feeling tired, empty, sad, resentful, angry, used, or hurt. It can run from the first signs of resistance or hesitation around an activity to full, impassioned non compliance. When we play on…
Anticipatory Service and Non Monogamy (Tillie King)
Feb 1 • 71 min
content warning: we briefly discuss blood play Sometimes when folks talk about a gold standard of service, they talk about anticipating the needs of someone else which is problematic to say the least. Getting it wrong is only human as no one is perfect.…
Solo Polyam, Sex Educator, and Mom (Robyn Beatch)
Jan 25 • 79 min
Content warning for those of you who struggle with white supremacy, racism, stripping, toxic monogamy, shame…I feel like whenever I tackle really hard topics this entire intro is basically one big content warning. We continue the interview with Robyn…
I Live in a Van (Selena)
Jan 18 • 66 min
Van Dwelling is for some a matter of necessity. For others, it’s a choice. What is it? Exactly what it sounds like: living in your vehicle. In some communities, housing is quite expensive. In some lives, being functional long enough to produce the…
Desi Vibes (Irene)
Jan 11 • 79 min
Irene is newish to kink. She started a sex and feminism blog where’s she’s currently an avid blogger (thedesivibes.com) and hopes to be an educator one day. For a South Asian woman, that’s not really a thing for our community yet for a variety of reasons,…
Playing Games with Love (Olivier)
Jan 4 • 52 min
Olivier creates community by creating events. Often those events involve playing various kinds of games. When he first came into the Vancouver kink scene, he created the Vancouver Geeky and Kinky munch which he has since moved on from. Today, the VG & K…
Orientation, Nonmonogamy, and Jealousy (Irene)
Dec 28, 2019 • 78 min
Orientation is for some, a lifelong struggle. Others rarely question it beyond their teenage years. I define orientation as the gender presentations to which one is attracted. Others might define it as the gender identities to which one is attracted.…
Writing in the Margins (Mark Hughes)
Dec 7, 2019 • 56 min
Mark Hughes returns in this episode, discussing addiction and recovery. His history of encountering emotional abuse, homelessness, substance use, sexual assault, and prison didn’t stop him doing a twelve step program and getting sober. Faced with…
Green Eyes, AFOG (Piper)
Nov 30, 2019 • 94 min
In this episode, Piper, one of my former domestic, kink, and sex partners is back to talk about jealousy. They share lessons of non monogamy that can often benefit everyone including the monogamous. These emotional self-management and interpersonal skills…
Manifesto Destiny (Piper)
Nov 23, 2019 • 54 min
Hello, Intimates! In this episode, I interview Piper, a former partner and current relationship anarchist. We focus on what works for each of us and how we make what it work. We also acknowledge what didn’t work. When the phrase relationship anarchy is…
Mother, Mistress, Sadist (MsBlaze)
Nov 16, 2019 • 83 min
Today’s introduction is long because we touch on some pretty advanced stuff. Thanks for bearing with me. Normalizing behaviours is key to getting rid of shame and stigma, the key to promoting intimacy on our own terms. Shame isolates people, and rarely is…
On a Break (Oz Riley)
Nov 9, 2019 • 83 min
Each person offers a unique set of intimate interactions they want with you. They may want different kinds of sex, spooning, cuddling, hugging, kissing, or other forms of touch. And/or They may want varying levels of emotional engagement to meet needs…
Exposure Therapy (X)
Nov 2, 2019 • 71 min
Media representations impart behavioural instructions and give us clear information on what is normal and what is abnormal - in short: what we should and shouldn’t do. They’re also a warning of what the consequences are if we show we are different. If the…
ASMR, Asexuals, and Sex (Stephanie Si)
Oct 19, 2019 • 58 min
Stephanie Si is back to talk about asexuals and/or demisexuals like herself who masturbate and who find creative ways to have sex outside of the kind where a penis goes in any of the 3 major orifices. She calls it her “no 3 holes” policy. We briefly talk…
Discovering Queerness and Gender in My 40s (Kat Stark)
Oct 5, 2019 • 61 min
The author, podcaster, and blogger Kat Stark is back for another session. We talk about bisexuality, queerness, pegging, the fear of not being queer enough, heteromantic queer orientations, queer sex, being genderqueer and having a complicated wardrobe;…
A Very Friendly Interrogation (Emma)
Oct 5, 2019 • 50 min
In Emma’s first two years being kinky, she’s learned a lot. We’ll talk about what she gets out of exploring submission, how service serves her, how she’s learned about this lifestyle, and what she’s currently still learning about. We also talk briefly…
Slutty Wanderlust and Psychedelic Journeys (Kris Perry)
Sep 21, 2019 • 67 min
Kris is a friend who describes herself as “an acquired taste who talks a lot” and who I’d describe as a psychedelic taking, van dwelling, wreck beach nudist since 14, free spirit hippie - oh yes, and she describes herself as “insanely polyamorous.” While…
Sex Positivity in My 40s (Kat Stark)
Sep 7, 2019 • 64 min
Kat Stark is an author, podcaster, and blogger at https://onthewetcoast.com. They talk about their marital renaissance, slut shame, slut empowerment, overcoming non monogamy shame through consensual nonconsent fantasy, swinging, how the book “Come As You…
Family History and Her Siblings (My Mom)
Aug 3, 2019 • 48 min
Today I’m recording another session with my mother who was born in India in 1954. We dive deeper into her relationships with her parents, talk a little more about the early parts of her marriage, and about her university exams. Some of this information is…
Family Interrupted, A Mother’s Story (My Mom)
Jul 20, 2019 • 63 min
Today I’m practicing great vulnerability with my mother who was born in India in 1954. We touch on what her family relationships were like and how she built intimacy in those relationships. We get side-tracked a bunch and my mother’s words can be…
Status, Shame, and Sex in Our 40s (Lisa and Paula)
Jul 6, 2019 • 83 min
Status and shame stick with each of us differently and follow us through life. Today we meet Lisa and Paula, two monogamous, vanilla, heterosexual women of colour in their 40s. They’re both successful entrepreneurs and mothers and wives who met during…
Poetry, Roommates, and More (Adèle Barclay)
Jun 15, 2019 • 65 min
Had the pleasure of sitting down with Adele Barclay - Stranger to me so we take some time sussing each other out - Queer femme - Poet focusing on intimacy and power - Published: “If I were in a cage, I’d reach out for you” is already out - Has a grant for…
Public Service and Bootblacking (Tillie)
Jun 1, 2019 • 56 min
Tillie King is a local queer femme bootblack. She describes herself as someone with mental illness. Some would say she’s one of the community matriarchs. Her perspective on intimate violence both consensual and non consensual is nuanced and interesting. I…
My Father Was KKK (Robyn Beatch)
May 18, 2019 • 59 min
- content warning: white supremacy - Ranting and off topic is usual and can help with rest - What’s your trigger plan for today? What do you need if you get triggered? - calm harm app - Do you use inappropriate jokes ever to cope with the awkwardness or…
Making Babies in Consensual Non Monogamy (Elle)
May 4, 2019 • 68 min
Elle and I chat about relationship anarchy and finding baby-raising nesting partners. Non monogamy and coparenting are definitely things that can work together. Enjoy our lively conversation and possibly the dulcet sounds of my trying to discreetly eat an…
Compassionately Communicating Needs (Sia)
Apr 20, 2019 • 85 min
Service is complicated Shame is powerful It might once have been complicated The results to me feel very simple Worth is hard to foster Coping with worthlessness is hard Self care isn’t obvious to many people My journey of understanding self care began…
A Veteran of Masculinity (Kyle Huntley)
Apr 6, 2019 • 63 min
A kinky, nonmonogamous reserve forces veteran and former MRA discusses different cultures of masculinity and what healing has looked like for him on the road to healthier relationships with himself and his intimate partners.
Addiction and Our Intimate Selves (Yana Skorstengaard)
Mar 16, 2019 • 58 min
Yana, a criminology student, discusses addiction, shame, abuse, and intimacy from her own experience and research.
Educating without Colonialism (Kyle Huntley)
Mar 2, 2019 • 89 min
An educator and former MRA discusses SOGI (sexual orientation and gender identity), GSA (gender and sexuality alliance), and the importance of curriculum. We discuss accomplishing learning objectives using content from queer and indigenous sources.
Prison, Gender, and Addiction (Yana Skorstengaard)
Feb 16, 2019 • 95 min
Yana, a criminology student, discusses the intersection of prison, gender, and addiction with me. We haven’t seen each other in more than a decade, so we spend some time catching up first.
Personal Growth in Nonmonogamy (Emma)
Jan 19, 2019 • 65 min
Relationships of all shapes and sizes require skills. While monogamy and nonmonogamy sometimes require different skills, sometimes they suffer from the same pitfalls. Emma talks about some toxic relationship ideas and monogamous ideals that don’t serve us…
A Good Day for Sex Work (Selena)
Dec 22, 2018 • 78 min
I chat with Selena, a sex worker for an escort service downtown about the stigma and dangers of sex work. We discuss sex work types, legalities, and resources. Resources are posted on posted about testosterone in older men and how women can promote…
Opening Up Preparation and Perfectionism (Emma)
Dec 8, 2018 • 69 min
Emma, a woman in a monogamous partnership is currently in discussions surrounding opening up her relationship. Today we’ll talk about why Emma wants to practice nonmonogamy, what she’s interested in practicing, and the preparation / pre-work she’s been…
Dealing with Shame (Gloria Jackson-Nefertiti)
Nov 3, 2018 • 84 min
Shame expert Gloria Jackson-Nefertiti discusses her experience of shame and then offers some strategies (and a worksheet linked in the description) on transcending shame.
Lifetime Anxiety (Cathy Vartuli)
Oct 6, 2018 • 69 min
Anxiety, emotional management, introversion, and trauma. I explain the window of tolerance and some somatic exercises that I learned in counselling to get out of my head and back into my body. Cathy Vartuli discusses the professional work she does in and…
Manifesto Destiny (Piper)
Sep 22, 2018 • 54 min
In this episode, I interview Piper, a former partner and current relationship anarchist. We focus on what works for each of us and how we make what it work. We also acknowledge what didn’t work. This is by far one of my favourite episodes and I’m very…
Pulling the Trigger (Mark Hughes)
Sep 8, 2018 • 64 min
In this episode, Mark Hughes, a friend of mine talks about the impacts of socialization and scripts he learned while poor, homeless, or in prison. Content warning for those of you who just can’t: this podcast includes Mark discussing trauma he has…
Intimate Struggle (MsBlaze)
Aug 24, 2018 • 78 min
My focus in relationship interviews is helping flesh out the experiences that inform where a person is today: who they are and what relationship values they hold. In this podcast, my guest excels at ruthless honesty, being self critical of her struggles,…
Anger and Masculinity (Levi)
Aug 10, 2018 • 87 min
If you’re a masculine person as I frequently am, anger is sometimes frightening to others, especially if they’ve seen masculine violence which is likely. In today’s session we’ll ask guiding questions like “where is it safe to express and process anger”…
Rewriting Our Scripts (Oz Riley)
Aug 3, 2018 • 62 min
Want to better your relationships? Get confident asking for what you really want? Have more satisfying sex? Welcome to Intimate Interactions Podcast with Victor Salmon. Today’s guest is Oz Riley, a gender non conforming relationship anarchist.
Director’s Cut (X)
Aug 3, 2018 • 63 min
My anonymous guest, X, a director from Vancouver helps dissect the very basics of non monogamy and discrimination. This is the first in an Introduction to Scripts series which is part of Intimate Interactions, a podcast about relationships, sex, and…