tcr! diaries - podcast

tcr! diaries - podcast

tcrbang.com
The ebbs and flows of this alcoholic. It’s all true. Sometimes I’m serious. Sometimes I’m not. The episodes tend to be short.
When I be my best self
Aug 5, 2018
I’ve been working on my magazine pretty much since I got up, trying to get the July issue all done and off to the printer. Sometimes the pages and layouts just spill onto my screen effortlessly. It’ll sound kinda corny but when I do my best creative work…
Do you wanna know what will really suck?
Jul 28, 2018
It’ll be when you notice that the someone who you’ve spent years of your life with is now gone. You’ve already grieved in the months since they left and now it’s been a few years and then you realize again, for no apparent reason, that they no longer live…
In this icecapade parade (or life became balanced)
Jul 25, 2018
Wherein fate is for people who have given up, part 3 of 3. I’m going to jump right in because this story is already long enough in my head. And it’s taken far too long to write. I’ve grown weary of fate and all that it doesn’t have to offer. I’m ready for…
Treading water (or unfasten your seatbelts)
Jul 12, 2018
Wherein fate has limits, part 2 of 3. Toward the end of my drinking it was like treading water. Never going anywhere, not having any fun, just struggling to do the bare minimum to stay afloat. A soggy, pathetic, emotional mess. I was well past my reckless…
Within a 10 block radius
Jul 9, 2018
So this past weekend I pulled into the gas station to get some supplies. It’s the weekend and it’s sunny so the gas station is plum full of cars. I pull up close to the building in an empty spot. It wasn’t an official parking spot but gas stations are…
You cannot unbutton this jacket
Jul 8, 2018
Wherein fate is a miserable state, part 1 of 3. Rivers want to roll downhill. You can put a dam up and stop their flow but their destination won’t change. They all dump into the sea. And eventually your dam will give out and then you or somebody else will…
I eat more when I’m happy
Jul 2, 2018
Based on my scientific observations and the data I’ve collected as of late, I’ve found that I eat more when I’m happy. When I’m stressed I don’t want to eat at all. Now then, please note that I’ve gained 37 pounds over the last two months. In related…
Post mortem, Bourdain
Jun 25, 2018
The thing that I had a hard time wrapping my mind around with Anthony Bourdain’s suicide is that I kept thinking he was supposed to be above all of that. I wanted not to be surprised but I really was. I felt let down at first regardless of what I said. I…
Unless I’m a celebrity gardener
Jun 22, 2018
Not long ago I was reading an article wherein the author said that people aren’t going to care about what you’re doing. Like if I plant a wonderful garden people aren’t going to come from miles around to see it. They won’t throw flowers and shower me with…
Red faced robot
Jun 20, 2018
So I have this thing that I’ve been doing ever since I was a teenager. It’s not a healthy thing and I’ve struggled to let go of it ever since I stopped drinking. Most of the time I don’t even realize I’m doing it until after I’ve already done it. In the…
Reich Between the Eyes on the Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus soundtrack
Jun 19, 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8BxgZYjya8 Peeps, the soundtrack for Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus was released today digitally. I’m sure you’ve all been waiting for it just as I have. I’ve only listened to the first five songs but it’ll punch you in…
Share the road with bikes?
Jun 14, 2018
How about they go the speed limit? Or obey the traffic signals? Or decide if they’re going to be on the street or the sidewalk? I ride my bike as much as anybody. Okay, that’s not true. I have a bike in my garage and I’ve only ridden a few times this…
I fucked this up
Jun 13, 2018
I set up an auto-renew feature on a client’s website not long ago so members could check a box and have their member account renewed each year. It’s a win-win for the client and the member since neither would need to do anything. The client would collect…
It forever influences the present
Jun 12, 2018
I was talking with one of my friends several months ago and I brought up something that sounded an alarm in her. What I’d just touched on triggered an unhappiness almost like ripping someone’s blanket off on a chilly night when they’re sound asleep. I…
A frantic game of animal tag
Jun 11, 2018
On this morning, the 11th of June I was greeted with a squeaky chipmunk in the basement just as I sat down with my first cup of coffee. It filled my heart with joy as the two H-Ks (hunter killers) and a lone chipmunk played a frantic game of animal tag. A…
The geese on Riverside
Jun 6, 2018
Every time the geese hold up traffic on Riverside for more than five seconds, 50 cars deep pile up in both directions. I just want to punch them in the face. Every last one. The geese and the cars. Also: don’t wave to people while they’re out with their…
So then I rewrote parts
Jun 6, 2018
One time when I was eight or so I was out in the front yard washing my bike with the hose. I especially liked spraying the pedals and watching them spin out of control. My bikes have been near and dear to me ever since I learned how to ride and I took…
One particular night in Wyoming
Jun 5, 2018
And then there was that one time in 2006 when my brother and I drove halfway across the country in a U-Haul the size of Montana, pulling the Kia on a trailer. We were on an epic journey, moving from the state of Oregon to the state of Illinois. One…
Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around by Stevie Nicks & Tom Petty
May 30, 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UD0c58nNCQ Do you ever wanna say, “fuck this workday” and then turn off your computer and give your nearest co-worker a high-five as you storm out the office door, then slide down the stairwell railing and hop in your car,…
Speaking of consequences and desperation
May 29, 2018
Alcoholics can related to this. I’m not sure if others will… But one of the things that made it so easy for me to continue drinking was that I never had any real consequences. I never was in jail for more than a day or so, the bank never threatened to…
Just one can of my favorite soda
May 22, 2018
I was telling Sara last night about the time I was in a grocery store and they had 12 packs of my favorite soda. Unfortunately I couldn’t buy just one, the man was sticking it to me (and the world) by forcing me to buy all 12. So I did what any teenage…
Saturated, colorful clematis
May 18, 2018
And on this 18th day of May nature said lettuce have more flowers, specifically the saturated, colorful clematis. And the peeps of the world drew in a beautiful breath and embraced the brilliance. And then on a related note the man said, “If life is…
Route around the struggles
May 17, 2018
I talk about my dentist now and then because he and his staff are part of my life. And I talk about what’s going on that’s had some kind of impact on me. Granted, sometimes I talk about shit that doesn’t have an impact but whatever. So anyways awhile back…
my crocodile.mp3
May 7, 2018
I haven’t recorded any podcasts for a bit but I have every intention of soon, with intention being the keyword. In the meantime please enjoy a song I recorded some time in the early 2000s. I suppose once in a while I close my eyes while I’m on trial.Feel…
You can’t dump that there
May 5, 2018
For whatever reason the Chicago Tribune left newspapers on my sidewalk for three days in a row. I like that because reading the paper from start to finish broadens my horizons. I come across articles and the like that I wouldn’t have sought out on my own.…
Karma doesn’t torture us
May 3, 2018
While I was sitting with my nicotine withdrawal earlier, I was saying my morning prayers, asking god to take my nicotine addiction away, take all the pain and discomfort. And then I started to get crabby because these withdrawals have been going on for…
The light is green for both sides
Apr 30, 2018
This scene is my truck. I’m barreling north on Randall Road and need to turn left at the next intersection. There’s a handful of cars that are also barreling south toward the intersection. Because everybody’s got to get to work. The light is green for…
You’re still dumb
Apr 28, 2018
My podcasts were probably broken for the last few days or so. To make up for the flub, please enjoy this flashback to the late 90s. I wrote, recorded, played all the instruments, and even sang on this gem. Alias: graham sextonTitle: you’re still dumb…
Miracles are seen in light
Apr 27, 2018
I fall short in life. That’s not a judgment call or me being hard on myself. It just is. I’m just another guy wandering around aimlessly doing my best…and sometimes doing my least. Struggling to maintain that non-mistake-making state only makes my life…
A Key Lime Bomb in one hand
Apr 26, 2018
Guys, if you haven’t had one of Blue Goose’s Key Lime Bombs then you’re missing out. Eating one of those is way better than the time Christie Brinkley kissed me on the cheek. Okay, that’s a lie. That never happened. But my 16 year old self wishes it would…
We, as parents, make mistakes
Apr 25, 2018
Maggie had a little scare yesterday. She had gotten off the school bus and was walking the minute walk back to our house down the alley. Some dude was also walking down the alley behind her and that didn’t sit well with her. I generally get home 15 to 20…
A little dog and wild carrots
Apr 20, 2018
Let me first say that I’m an animal lover as much as the next Dr. Doolittle. It’s rare that I meet a dog or cat and they don’t end up liking me sooner or later. I think mostly that’s because I don’t care if they like me or not. However, the neighbor’s dog…
Like I’m going to fall over
Apr 17, 2018
I haven’t been writing as much because I’ve been struggling with my nicotine addiction. All sorts of things happen and don’t happen when I try to quit. Sometimes I’ll spout off something about quitting on social media or whatever but lately I’ve just been…
Brushing my teeth while driving
Apr 16, 2018
I think what annoys me most about driving on Randall Road is that the speed limit is 45 mph but with the sheer amount of daytime traffic and number of stoplights by the Commons, I never get to actually go 45. See, if I can just get around these other cars…
It’s all really great news
Apr 13, 2018
Well over half the conversations I have are all words. Personal and professional. All reading and responding. I want to say there is no voice in them but each author has their own in black and white. It’s still all words though. Nothing verbal. The only…
Apologies as presents
Apr 10, 2018
On a person’s special day if I tell the person that I forgot to give or get them a present, it’s like instead of giving them their actual present I’m giving them an “I forgot” instead. Regardless if I actually do give them the present later. It’s better…
A peer in the revolution
Mar 27, 2018
And then there was that one time when myself and two older friends were drinking and carrying on, using too many drugs, and just driving around out in the country. And then they decided they wanted to rob a house. Being younger I went along with their…
Not often with surgical precision
Mar 23, 2018
I’m not overly fond of the word, “slice.” I never say slice. Not a slice of pizza or a slice of pie. It’s always a piece. “Splice” is okay but remove the “p” and it’s out of the question. I never slice anything either. I cut shit. Not often with surgical…
Memories are what make places feel like home
Mar 22, 2018
When I was a kid living in a little town in Iowa, our neighborhood, our street, our house they all felt like home to me. I always felt secure, always felt like I belonged. My life was feature complete on that block. I’m sure it was because that house on…
Not caring what other people think
Mar 20, 2018
Abstract I think all that jive about “not caring what other people think” is mostly bullshit. Exhibit A When I puff out my chest and chant the “I don’t care what they think“ mantra, it feels like I’m just giving myself a free pass to act like an asshole.…
About those bullfights
Mar 18, 2018
Sara and I watched Anthony Bourdain in Spain last night. I wish that watching bullfights didn’t bother me as much as it does but I could never get behind a sport like that. Not that I’m somebody big and influential or whatever but killing an animal so you…
SpongeBob was in my dream last night
Mar 14, 2018
Like I was all about SpongeBob. I went into my bedroom to have a nap (which is kind of funny that even in my dreams I’m thinking about taking a nap). And then when I laid down on my bed it was SpongeBob as far as the eye could see. I had a keychain, a…
Why are these people standing so close to me?
Mar 13, 2018
For much of my life I’ve been internally combustible and physically uncomfortable. I felt ill and under and unequipped just being human. Even trying to be human. Too much shit gurgling in my stomach. Never ending mallet beating my heart. Intestines put on…
Scowling at the clock
Mar 13, 2018
My cat was glaring at me as I was putting on my shoes this morning. I was like “what the fuck are you looking at?“ Yeah, it was early. And then as I’m walking into the other room I looked back at her and she was still scowling, scowling at something off…
Reassuring our fellow humans
Mar 10, 2018
The scene is a parking lot. An elderly woman is walking up ahead of me as I’m driving. She looks fragile, defenseless, and unsure. She sees my truck and a look of terror comes across her face. While it’s not a monster my Dakota is still 4000 pounds of…
Something Just Like This by The Chainsmokers & Coldplay
Mar 9, 2018
Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FM7MFYoylVs Peeps, here’s your batman-with-his-fists Friday jam. I know I’ve said this before but I absolutely hated songs like this in another life. Jams like this would come on when I was a teenager or…
When others are behaving badly
Mar 6, 2018
It’s easy to be of the mindset that how people behave is their business and I shouldn’t let it affect me. But that’s a level of spiritual enlightenment most likely I’ll never reach. Setting such a high bar for myself always makes me feel like I’m coming…
Moments of belligerence
Mar 6, 2018
Friends. Family. Total strangers. I don’t consider himself an arrogant person. One evening, however, when I was running “who do I have to blow” late, I was pulled over. You may have heard this policeman story before. It was many years ago so don’t get too…
Long Crash Cymbal
Mar 5, 2018
“You can’t just post one of your songs as a podcast.” “I do what I want.” #photos #tcrmusic #diariespodcast Add a comment! View original
A tag below my chin
Mar 2, 2018
I don’t know how it is that I still put on my shirt backwards. I get one on, something feels uncomfortable, and then I look down and see a tag below my chin. What the fuck? Am I five? I pull my arms out and then do the straitjacket maneuver to spin it…
Sunset for Feb 27th, 2018
Feb 27, 2018
Everything goes up-and-down I suppose. Sometimes life is bright, sometimes it’s a fireball. Sometime it’s not. And then also it’s good for me to let things go just as the sun sets. It’ll rise tomorrow and life will bring me something new. Maybe another…
“NOT YOU”
Feb 26, 2018
And there was that one time way back in high school when my best friend and I would sit in the round-a-bout in the middle of town. When cars would circle by we would wave “HI” at them. And then when they’d wave back, we’d shout belligerently “NOT YOU.”…
Assume the future will be good
Feb 23, 2018
Here’s a peek behind the curtain. Maggie and I are both introverts. We’re most comfortable hanging out alone or with just one or two people. In the winter we isolate even more. It’s cold outside and neither of us are into sledding and all that wintery…
Alarm clock crazy, no thanks
Feb 22, 2018
Denny’s circa Dec 22, 2017 Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.— Step 2 of Alcoholics Anonymous The drug and alcohol treatment center I went to in the early 90s was 12-step based. Their treatment plan was to have…
Communal cigarette larceny
Feb 21, 2018
So one time when I was “quit smoking” I was headed up to see my dentist in Elgin. Don’t ask me for a referral. He’s long since retired and is probably off riding a mule in the Grand Canyon these days. He actually rode a mule there once. A mule by the name…
Abe Froman, tater-tot king of Geneva
Feb 21, 2018
Just to put this out there… I’m not preparing some gourmet tator-tot frenzied extravaganza here nor am I Abe Froman, tater-tot king of Geneva. Think of the tator-tots more as party food that will be available, same as Doritos or Hot Tamales. My plan is to…
A get-together this coming Saturday
Feb 17, 2018
I’m *thinking* about having a get-together this coming Saturday, February 24th. If you’re reading this you’re invited. It would be a social mixer of sorts with snacks and drinks. No, I’m not making you all dinner. Tater-tots could possibly be available.…
Ye old anti-climatic climax
Feb 17, 2018
There’s an Italian mobster that lives up the street from me. He looks Italian but maybe he’s Greek. I’ve never talked to him but we’ve exchanged waves at the communal mailbox. I have a theory that he’s in the witness protection program although I don’t…
Nobody can fuck with you
Feb 12, 2018
Remember that one time when you were younger? When nobody could fuck with you? Because everything had fallen into place. Because all the dots connected. Maybe your best friend was there. It doesn’t matter who you were with or how or when you got there.…
Throwing it on the floor
Feb 11, 2018
I hate when I go to throw something away and then just end up throwing it on the floor. I mean, what the hell is this? It’s not like I’m threading the space needle shuttle in the vacuum of outer space. And then I forgot to put a dryer sheet in with my…
Mostly it just makes you feel worse
Feb 10, 2018
And then there was that one time when one of my brothers called me out of the blue. I hadn’t talked to him in close to three years and we were just catching up, talking about a whole lot of nothing. And then without warning or skipping a beat or barely…
What to do when someone bails the conference call
Feb 10, 2018
Question posted to Facebook: Just got stood up for an 8am conference call. Any suggestions for punishments for the offending party? My answer: I just like to stay on the call even when nobody shows up. I relax, have a nice cup of tea for an hour or so.…
A cranberry stuck
Feb 9, 2018
The scene is my work desk. I’m eating cashew, almond, and cranberry trail mix. One of the cranberries jumped from the cup. I saw it happen but didn’t hear the landing. After a mildly-extensive berry-hunt the fruit-trail gone-went cold. I cannot find the…
Mechanically and electrically perfect
Feb 4, 2018
Mechanically and electrically perfect, draft one. Recorded in GarageBand, same as the podcasts. I hate Sunday’s. 😒 Video file - MP4 Audio file - MP3 Cover art - JPG #audio #tcrmusic #diariespodcast Add a comment! View original
Maggie and I talk bacon
Feb 2, 2018
I picked Maggie up from her mom’s and on a whim we did a quick, off the cuff podcast in my truck on the way back home. There’s some background noise but that’s what happens when you’re recording while driving 45 mph. And yes, she was holding the phone and…
Here’s what happens when you unfriend someone
Feb 2, 2018
This showed up on my timeline just a little bit ago. So Facebook “noticed” I unfriended somebody. I highly doubt if they just “noticed” anything. They KNOW our every move people. They track and follow said movements even when we’re not on their website or…
Communication, off the top of my head
Feb 2, 2018
Kidding aside, I mean what I say when I talk and write to people. I try to be clear when I’m kidding but sometimes they don’t get it. Then I feel bad. Sometimes it’s understood when I’m joking but generally it isn’t with people I don’t know. I do my best…
Holidays come once a year
Jan 28, 2018
In the mid 2000s I made and hung this in our kitchen. Because I’m an asshole. I never really think (or have thought) about anybody else. Like if I have four hours of no responsibility I will sit and play video games for four hours. I won’t call anybody, I…
Why I never answer my cell phone
Jan 23, 2018
A few years back someone by the name of Floyd inadvertently gave my cell number to his insurance agent. And then that domino’ed into my number getting on every insurance company’s call list. I’ve tried being nice to them, tried asking them to put me on…
Grace for others
Jan 21, 2018
I would guess there’s been 5-10 relationships I’ve had with people where I’ve written them off. And I’m not talking about small relationships either. These are like personal relationships that have lasted for years. And I wrote these people off because I…
Cleaning the stove at 5:17 pm on a Friday
Jan 19, 2018
I’ll get to the picture in a minute. The real question is why am I having 2 to 3 bowel movements a day on average? Is it my diet? My posture? My sleep schedule? My collection of fine leather pirate boots? I’m just kidding. I don’t poop that often. Really,…
I’ve always been at war with machine X
Jan 16, 2018
I can only feel hurt and blame someone else for so long. And after that time is over I have to either say something or let it go. I don’t have the right to hold onto my hurt for years if I’m not gonna do anything about it. Not doing anything other than…
No sirens, no lights, just horsepower
Jan 12, 2018
When I was driving to work this morning a sheriff’s car was behind me in the other lane. As we approached the intersection on Randall and 64 the stoplight turned yellow. I slowed down and stopped because I’m sure the sheriff had his eye on me. And of…
Under Maggie’s pillow
Jan 9, 2018
And then there was that one time maybe six or seven years ago when I ate a Snickers fun-size and hid the wrapper under Maggie’s pillow. And then at bedtime when we found it and she was horrified of being convicted of a crime she didn’t commit, after she…
Speaking of REO Speedwagon
Jan 4, 2018
And then there was that one time (yesterday) that I was thinking pretty much everyone I meet and know in the here and now aren’t dicks. It’s a big shift in my perspective. When I was younger I used to believe that most people were assholes but then as I…
So long as I continue to do it
Dec 30, 2017
I’m overly fond of how they worded all of AA’s Twelve Steps.Case in point: the 11th Step. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to…
I can be a fruity butterfly
Dec 21, 2017
If you’re not familiar with AA’s Twelve Steps, don’t worry none. Just follow along and you’ll get the gist. When I worked Step One I was in horrible, emotional pain. Nightmarish pain that’d wake me up at night. Day in and day out pain unlike anything I’d…
Sun glows in the mirrors
Dec 16, 2017
As I lay here in bed before I get up to make coffee I was enjoying the morning glow. Sometimes I’ll get just a glimmer of something in life and think, “I want more of that!” But then I’ll sit around and wait for the universe to give it to me. And then…
Almost two years have past
Dec 6, 2017
Not long after my ex-wife moved out I couldn’t stand to be in the house alone in the morning. Like after Maggie went to school the stillness was unbearable. I couldn’t wait to leave to go to work. Now that almost two years have past I’m sitting in the…
I don’t consider myself high maintenance
Dec 1, 2017
However… I don’t like anything touching my feet. Except socks. Or other footwear. I don’t even touch my own feet. Unless I have to. I won’t look at my belly button. It’s on its own as far as I’m concerned. About 18 months ago I threw away every Q-tip in…
Break On Through by The Doors
Dec 1, 2017
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOpQjD-rX0g Peeps, here’s your the-gate-is-straight Friday jam. Listening to The Doors when I was 9 and 10 opened up my musical world so much more than bands like the Beatles did. Don’t get me wrong, I love yellow…
PechaKucha Night (cont)
Dec 1, 2017
In follow up to tonight’s earlier PechaKucha Night in Batavia This lady was eating popcorn with complete disregard for public safety I was sitting in a room full of people that obviously have the same kind of interests that I do. But I didn’t know…
Each and every time I started writing
Nov 24, 2017
People always say that the 12 steps are in order for a reason. I guess I never really paid that much attention to that statement until after I was in recovery for a year or so. Looking back on my experience with Step 4 I know there’s no way in hell that I…
I really did paint my couch
Nov 20, 2017
Well, not all of it. And of course it didn’t go completely according to plan. Maggie and I were going to be gone all weekend and I had a time window of about 30 minutes on Friday to do my thing. I wanted to do it in that particular window, too, so the…
FREE dismantled treadmill
Nov 17, 2017
Guys, there’s a dismantled treadmill on East Side Drive, a little north of Dodson Street here in Geneva, Illinois. I’m assuming it’s free since it’s resting comfortably on the curb. Whenever I see a treadmill or a stationary bike on the side of the road I…
Potato eyes, to eat or not to eat
Nov 15, 2017
Potato murder - MP4Peeps, I may have asked this before and I may not have. Either way I swung I’m going to ask again. When dealing with potatoes do you cutout their little eyeballs out or do you ignore them and chow down? I have to scrub them off myself…
Each and every single target
Nov 15, 2017
Sometimes I’m driving along, got something on my mind. And then I get the feeling that whatever I’m thinking about, well, I think that I should be worried about it. And then I start thinking, “why the hell am I not having a panic attack?” Like this is…
Can I spray paint my couch?
Nov 11, 2017
Well, I guess there’s nothing that would actually stop me but what are the pros and cons? The ebbs and flows? The ups and downs of such a Jackson Pollock maneuver? Granted he used brushes and had more of a splatter/drip/drop technique with the reds and…
Doing more, more, more
Nov 10, 2017
Back when I was drinking I wasn’t enough. Inside. I wanted something, anything to tell me that I was. And one of those things I wanted, probably the biggest was “more.” Not just more drinking but more “doing”, too. Constantly feeling on the go, I got this…
I only saw her rage
Nov 5, 2017
Last night I heard an Al-Anon speaker say that she was very angry with her husband while he was drinking. But really she was scared. Scared for a variety of reasons, if he was going to really hurt himself, and so on. When I was drinking my ex-wife was…
Mildy Seeking Mannequins
Oct 31, 2017
I still need to get a couple mannequins. I think about this often, at least daily. Well, maybe every other day. They’ll provide some kind of ambience, some kind of atmosphere that I need. In my house. Preferably the dining room. No, there’s nothing sexual…
Social grace at the ATM drive-through
Oct 28, 2017
Please note local residents: ATM drive-throughs are one way. You should not back up for any reason. Think of the ATM lane to be like a waterslide. You should only go down, never up. If you try to swim or climb back up le slide, chances are you’ll destroy…
More knob twists
Oct 27, 2017
I’m in the private, single person work restroom. Somebody tries the door knob. It refuses because I’m not an animal and therefore lock the door. Again, with the twisting. I scowl at the door. More knob twists. This time as if brute force will unlock the…
Super Target has Blue Diamonds
Oct 26, 2017
One time my brother ate a whole bag of walnuts. And my mom was furious. She still talks about it to this day even though said feeding happened sometime in the 80s. Apparently the walnuts were a gift to my mom from my grandpa during one of his nation-wide…
Amazing blueberry jelly
Oct 19, 2017
I hate it when I’m walking down the work hallway and I hear another office door open. Can’t I just walk down the hall alone, with peace and quiet? Now matter how much I try to avoid people, some random body shows up and says, “hello.” And then I have to…
There’s a gentleman we’ll call Gary
Oct 17, 2017
So we all know that our phones are a huge part of our lives. We take them pretty much every where. They say that they’re generally the first thing we look at in the morning and the last thing we look at before going to sleep. However, I’ve came across a…
Making perfect plans
Oct 16, 2017
Sometimes I’m gonna do something. I plan it out in my head and think, “This is perfect. This lines up here and that lines up there.” And then I don’t do it. And then the next morning I think, “I’m glad I didn’t do that.” #confessional #diariespodcast Add…
3:52 pm on a Sunday afternoon
Oct 15, 2017
After Maggie goes to her mom’s for the day I’m always taken back by how quiet it is. After I get home from the errands and the store and have put away the groceries. Shut off the podcast and brought a load of laundry upstairs. I noticeably hear nothing…
They deserve it
Oct 13, 2017
When I was drinking I would hurt people, because that’s what I did when I was drinking, and then I would feel bad and avoid them. Sometimes go out of my way not to see them. And then when the day came around that I did, I would hang my head in shame and…
Blade Runner 2049 ticket
Oct 7, 2017
You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down and you see a tortoise. It’s crawling toward you. First time I’ve been to a movie by myself since The Phantom Menace. No weirdness so that’s good news. And the movie was…
My gear in mouth
Oct 4, 2017
There’s this saying, “better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt.” Sources have various versions, from Mark Twain to Abe Lincoln to that pesky critter King James. Anyways, who said it first and how they said it is…
With the wrong key
Oct 2, 2017
About an hour ago I put the wrong key in my back door. Like a moron. And then gave the knob a confident twist/push. And of course it wouldn’t turn. Or budge. It never does. With the wrong key. In that fatal moment I all but wanted to call a locksmith. To…
Fire hydrant flushing on the east side of Geneva
Sep 29, 2017
This post originally appeared on the Facebook group, What’s happening in Geneva, IL. I’m reposting here just in case someone decides the writing isn’t as exceptional as the Campana flame wars. I mean discussions. Guys, they’re doing fire hydrant flushing…
Let the cosmos be your guide
Sep 29, 2017
Maggie and I found this note while having gelato at Graham’s 318. Sometimes life pounds on my door, pounds with both hands to get my attention. But more often than not it’s just few taps, barely audible, just left of center. When I see those things out of…
Sunrise for Sep 27, 2017
Sep 27, 2017
Peeps, what was happening for me a few moments ago was a wonderful pinky orange sunrise. It’s Wednesday so we’re half-way through the week. Who can argue with hump day? NOBODY. That’s who. Also, I could really use Desperately Seeking Susan on DVD. Ya,…
FREE brand new Heat & Air Deflector
Sep 26, 2017
Earlier in the evening I solicited local residents for someone to make me dinner. Being fairly new to the concept of bartering online I now realize that may have been perceived as greedy, to simply want and take without offering and/or giving back to the…
What’s Happening in Geneva, Facebook group
Sep 24, 2017
I may need to leave the What’s Happening in Geneva Facebook group. I keep wanting to help with my web expert advice, wit, and charm. Below are two examples that I could barely resist (but did). Hi there, I Need recommendation for washing machine fix….…
We don’t want to spoil his suprise
Sep 21, 2017
In follow up to August 16th’s Provocative yet professional #email #hirasfashion #diariespodcast keamoose · Sep 21, 2017 at 7:31 pm They did leave the door open for that with “and more”. Have you seen this?…
Something I’ve never forgotten
Sep 21, 2017
And then there was that one time when I was fresh outta high school and floundering around like a moron. I didn’t have a job and was whining offhandedly about being poor while over at my sister’s house. Whining like teenagers do because everything…
When I see other drivers yawning
Sep 20, 2017
When I see other drivers yawning I’m oft tempted to open my mouth in unison if/when we make eye contact. Bepuzzlement would be almost guaranteed. #trafficnews #diariespodcast Add a comment! View original
Why are there so many pubes
Sep 18, 2017
Why are there so many pubes in the damn urinals? What the hell are people doing in there? 🙄 #socialproblems #diariespodcast #publicrestroom tcr! · Sep 18, 2017 at 4:04 pm Mona mentioned on FB, “folks not getting enough vitamins.” So I made a sign……
Proof would kill me (closure)
Sep 17, 2017
I’ve gotten a lot of feedback, much of it good, from the Proof would kill me duet. If you haven’t read them you should. Pause, go now, and resume reading afterward. Anyways… A good chunk of people can relate to the tragedy of infidelity because they’ve…
A pizza up on some roof
Sep 15, 2017
Someday I would like to order a pizza and then when the delivery guy hands it over, just throw it up on the roof, frisbee style. Not on my roof though. I don’t want a pizza on my roof. Like an asshole. I think that this would fulfill some part of me.…
Gas cap flopping around
Sep 13, 2017
Peeps, I was driving somewhere a few days back and was in a hurry. Of course. I’d stopped at the gas station a few minutes before and that had thrown me even more behind schedule. Of course. So I was sitting at this stoplight impatiently, rolling my eyes…
Proof would kill me (follow up)
Sep 11, 2017
In follow up to my earlier piece, Proof would kill me, I just want to put it out there that I only talked about two of the things that Kathy did that hurt me. I didn’t mention my sins, all the things I did to hurt her because that wasn’t the point I was…
Proof would kill me
Sep 10, 2017
20170910 - Proof would kill me - MP4 • Watch on YouTube → A year or so after I got divorced from my first wife one of our mutual friends said to me, “I’m so sorry that she cheated on you with John.” Now I always had a gut feeling about that but never knew…
Relapse and reservations
Sep 4, 2017
20170904 - Relapse and Reservations - MP4 • Watch on YouTube → After I’d been sober for a number of years I relapsed. It wasn’t something that I thought was gonna happen. And also, it didn’t “just happen” either. So with that being said I feel qualified,…
Essential rules for loving someone
Aug 22, 2017
If someone loves you then love them back. Don’t think about it. If someone loves you then pay attention to what they do. Often times they’re telling you, without words, that they do. If someone loves you then sometimes they won’t tell you. That’s okay.…
tcr! diaries podcast now available
Aug 21, 2017
So this is a thing now. Keep your expectations low. I mean like really low. I don’t know if it’ll be anything more than just an audio version of a written piece. We’ll see how it goes. Maybe I’ll ad-lib now and then. Maybe I’ll play the piano. At this…
Just the same as me
Aug 21, 2017
When I’m behaving badly it’s because I’m scared or my feelings are hurt or I’m upset or whatever. It’s not something I just do. There’s a reason there. And I’ve always appreciated it when other people have let me off the hook when I was acting badly. So…
Provocative yet professional
Aug 16, 2017
The conversation continues with September 21st’s We don’t want to spoil his suprise #email #hirasfashion #diariespodcast Add a comment! View original
Morning drinks mute the fires of hell
Aug 16, 2017
And then there was that one time when it was 8 or 8:15 in the morning. I had called in sick the last couple of days because I’d been drinking. Too much. I called in[1] that morning, too, because there wasn’t any way I was going to be able to pull myself…
All Out Of Love by Air Supply
Aug 13, 2017
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWdZEumNRmI Peeps, here’s a pop ballad for your Sunday morning. The chorus is good. Shut up. It reminds me of 80s skate parties and those couple of years, like 10 and 11, where my world was getting bigger but before being…
Seeking colorful Christian martyr to repel repeated Jehovah’s Witness
Aug 10, 2017
I have a sign but they keep coming back. I need you to intimidate them, get them away from my doorbell, and off my porch. For good. For permanently. I want you to make them feel like the Hindus did when holy-roller Robertson said they were all demonic. I…
No reason for me to be in a hurry
Aug 9, 2017
Sometimes I got something going on, something I’m burning too much daylight on, and I can’t figure it out. The path isn’t clear. The monkey chatter is as loud as it gets and I feel myself ratcheting up. One time way back in high school I was struggling…
Slip Slide Melting by For Love Not Lisa
Aug 4, 2017
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGKTDY_CqMU Peeps, here’s your find-a-space-in-the-sunshine Friday jam to blast you threw your workday. The audio’s not the best but it’ll do in broad daylight. The Crow soundtrack is still one of my favorite goto albums.…
Be uncomfortable as needed
Jul 26, 2017
I watched my mom go through something last year, something that was heart wrenching and devastating. It made her bitter and angry and changed how she saw things. What happened is her story and not important to this. What is important and what I want to…
Jul 9th, 2017 at 9:47:39 pm
Jul 9, 2017
And then there was that one time I was so full of hurt and rage that I wrote a letter equally as hurting and raging. Paper soaking wet with piss and vinegar. Stabbed dead with my pen. And then I was out in my garage smoking with letter in hand, still…
Eagerly seeking a Republican to prepare my 2016 taxes
Jul 7, 2017
Yes, I still haven’t filed my taxes. No, I don’t need a condescending accountant attitude. There will be geometry involved. I’ve working with two 1095 cones and one 1099 sphere. Be aware: those cones have unequal line items and currently do not balance…
Smelling like coffee and Captain Morgan
Jul 6, 2017
One time I was driving to work on a hot summer morning. Just like today. Hung over pretty bad and nursing a pint of rum. I was in complete agony, had a fiery headache, and starting to sweat because my truck didn’t have air conditioning. Taking shots now…
Jul 2nd, 2017 at 2:42:05 am
Jul 2, 2017
Starting tomorrow I will randomly and routinely wake the cats up during the day because, no matter how many times we talk about this, they continually wake me up in the middle of the night with their bullshit. And yes, when I do it will be in such a way…
A regular Bear Grylls
Jul 1, 2017
One time when I was 18 or so and had drank way more than I should’ve for it being the middle of the afternoon, I climbed way up this tree in my sister’s backyard, and then fell down the tree. Not out of it but down it. Like a fireman-pole-slide gone…
Desperately seeking a Democrat for light housework
Jun 29, 2017
Yes, you will be expected to clean. Netflix will be off-limits, however, you may bring headphones. But not your individualism. Independent thought is encouraged but keep moral outrage to yourself. This is a job not a march. Liberals are okay so long as…
Looking for a road to walk
Mar 13, 2017
One of my absolute favorite lines in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous is the last pertinent idea of How It Works (PDF): God could and would if he were sought. We only have to seek god, that is all. Half the time I don’t feel in touch with anything but…